Slig

Slow Horses is a show about how the British intelligence service needs to invest in more guns

Back to work next week. Luckily my job is very important, mentally stimulating & enriching both personally & for society as whole.

No opinions on Cheesecake Factory. Place I'm from was too low rent to have one and now that I live in an actual city you'd have to put a gun to my head to get me into a chain restaurant.

I have exacerbated my tinnitus

Forgot why I made this

A politician could be extremely successful by campaigning in front of a jumbotron playing a loop of jingling keys & never saying a word.

Depop is so funny. People asking for measurements on am $8 sweater.

Happy Saturday, time to help our neighbors. ICE's illegal occupation of the twin cities continues to have impacts. I'm vouching for this gfm to support a family facing deportation action. Contribute if you can: gofund.me/ef3592d07

Watching someone play electric guitar all regular: "Nice." Watching someone put a guitar up to the amp so it makes a bunch of noise: "Holy shit!"

Baby is down for a nap but if I try to play video games this happens

Bummer that no political canvassers have been by the house this year. It would have been nice to fill them with dread & sadness.

The first football video game with a dedicated CTE meter

Watching that Crystal Lake which is better than most things on TV just by virtue of requiring actors with actual human faces to be in just to fit the look of the original film.

Just walked around the house calling for one cat while the other followed me also calling for her.

SWAN BOAT SEASON HAS ENDED

Someone should do the obvious thing.

That streamer guy that all the freaks have been talking about is coming to town. My opinion? He should have to give me money.

Friend who works at Sam's Club has been giving live updates on swarms of people decending on the store to buy needoh toys that the store doesn't carry.

Thinking about all the Carhartts & old band tees I could have sold for absurd amounts of money if I'd have kept them around. Better become a hoarder going forward.

I thought the Green Room guy was directing a Parker adaptation but it's just some horror movie also called Slayground. Boring.

Baby just cried for 2 hours straight for no reason. I legitimately may have had a brain hemorrhage.

Nice out. Good shooting old appliances at the dump weather.

Been getting videos like this on Instagram even though I don't play guitar. Must be doing something right.

Accidentally dressed like Quint from Jaws. #menswear #film

I should have went to the No Kings event so some speaker could remind me to vote. I probably won't remember now.

"30K isn't a life-changing amount of money" -guy who went to an 80K a year college & has never entered the actual workforce.

Horror movies are similar to cape comics in that they will continue to mostly suck until they start being made by people who don't really give a shit about horror movies again.

Had to cut down on using my trademark catchphrase "I'm going to kill myself" since I had a kid.

Terminally online journos love having bad haircuts & generally looking like total shit.

Duh wobot car went vwoom vwoooom an go'd up duh ramp an did a fwip!

Greta Gerwig yelling "No! Again! This time MORE Protestant!" at two confused 8 year olds standing in front of a greenscreen.

I beat Sebulba in a race & my daughter is completely unimpressed. I'm beginning to think she doesn't even know who Sebulba is...

Went to a demonstration in the park. Nice little turn out.

Paris 1919 has soothed all creatures in the house

Hitting a crash cymbal & then immediately grabbing it so it stops making noise is so cool.

Too much snacking due to baby. Gonna boil 24 eggs.

Not worried about things popping off in my state. I'll stop it by livestreaming whatever bad shit happens while yelling "You can't do that!" Or "That is illegal!" Or "You are on camera right now!"

Ah good I found some expired baclofen & cyclobenzaprine.

Lol Green Lantern show has alien suicide bombers. Tom King the undefeated ultra-hack.

Doctors & physical therapists recommend this one trick for chronic back pain

I watched that youtuber movie that was basically a bad Twilight Zone episode now I have to watch that one that's about yellow hallways.

Good to see obnoxious "funny" insurance commercials are still ubiquitous. I'm pretty sure at least half of the last shitty novel I wrote was just descriptions of a series of insurance commercials.

Scientists observing animals: They may seem to mourn their dead but we must be never allow ourselves to anthropomorphize these creatures. Scientists observing software programmed to shit out bad country songs & undress pictures of random women: We have created God

The baby is constantly making annoyed grunts & growls of exertion like a stymied anime character. Her first word will be てめえ

Vapin' on the porch