Teknopaul

Elon has had to replace his high tech Russian bots with a python script.

Everywhere is a good place for a kid to have their head in a book. But a specially good place is on top of unofficial street furniture.

There's no such thing as feral cats. Some cats just don't think dry biscuits is fair recompense for having to shit in a box with a human watching.

So you think you're forgetful? Bono from U2 started in 1986 And he stiiiiiiillll Hasn't fooooouuuund What he's looking fooooor

Meatloaf is a good safe word. It means I would do anything for love, but I won't do that...

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Fun fact: Leonardo de Carpio initially supported Project 25, but now it's 26 he doesn't.

Trump announces plans for his presidential library

No lies detected

Everybody has the right to vote in secret, but that doesn't mean you can't tell everyone how you vote. Now might be a good time for libs to set up community groups so they can contact each other and compare published results with what they collectively know the numbers should be.

If you boil rice, lentils, and a small amount of green veg, you can live off that everyday. You may think I'm mad, but half the world does it.

This lamda could have been a for loop

I'll happily recommend you follow Babe Ruthless, & I'm definitely nobody

At least it's a dry skeet.

They don't know your password, they store hashes. It's a good to learn how works. They can check your password but they don't have it.

I have ann increasingly concerning carbon footprint from burning onions.

Given the current political climate, pop stars should stop singing "I love you baby"

"I recently bought a toilet brush... Long story short, I'm going back to toilet paper."

Que pena. Tenía graffiti tan guapa. Hasta hoy parece que falta vida, es esteril y limpio. Una gran nada donde había un gran algo. ACAB

They really press my buttons. Especially the little one at the back of my throat that makes me vomit.

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There just ain't enuf good guys anymore 😢

🚗☀️ Solar panels are moving beyond rooftops. Chinese automotive glass manufacturer Fuyao Glass says it now has mass-production capabilities for vehicle-integrated solar roofs, with PV cells built directly into laminated car glass.

Can you OD on ketamine and if so what’s the holdup

I spent 30 years learning to write code, thanks to AI, my skills are now 100% dead. I have become expert in a new field by not being bitter. IMHO artists should ask themselves am I skilled? or am I creative? (or both) Because AI will never be creative.

crash out with your gash out

You can't link to a comment and it's reply, but this is gold.

It’s election week! At this important moment I would like to address your entire planet with a message to the people of Earth. And I think I found the perfect place to do it.

All USA's problems would be solved if politicians and the C suite had to retire at 65.

Siempre quisé un caganet de Jason Stratham, mas grande major.

Market news: Taylor Farms put in a bid to buy the Irish company Guinness. Seems like diversification, but TF are expecting synergies in their legal departments dealing with explosive diarrhea.

Ojo: Nuevo regalas de Brexshit. Tarda otra hora y medio para pasar el checkin a Eukei ahora en El Prat. No se puede hacerlo en el Internet. Traiga un buen libro

For years people have been dressing up as the opposite sex for shits n giggles. In the UK now, it's just for giggles

Monday, bloody Monday

Yamal es un puto héroe 😍 Deservedly happy kids: they earned that win, working together, technically superior, psychologically collective, athletically hardcore, cool in the face of aggression, unfazed by rough justice. Keep the faith team: fair play wins in the long run.

Look, I know Europeans get accused of being smug all the time, but I'm just eating lettuce.

I wasn’t ready for this. ☠️ 😭 Low T Pete will never live this down.

Hurrah for two factor authentication! I wouldn't want anyone maliciously shitposting nonsense in my name.