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Which is not to say that online mutual aid is therefore always bad or that it’s bad to participate in it, but we have to be very honest about how it creates a pretty brutal competition.
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Even within the official huamniatarian aid space, beneficiaries needed to show they met vulnerability criteria. This is a function of any operation with limited resources ($10m is still a limit). Success stories and other fundraising and/or reporting items created by NGOs include performance of need
However, vulnerability criteria were generally things the community already knew about beneficiaries. For example, pregnant and lactating women, women-headed households, the elderly and/or disabled, and other criteria included in the IPC criteria (FEWS.net is a great resource for this).