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Everything is a conspiracy when you don't know how anything works.

union person@junlper.beer

i love olivia reingold so much. she's a top contender for dumbest "journalist" in the entirety of human history

147 reposts1.2K likes

But how does water -know- how to move downhill? Clearly it must have a sort of linked memory and is following that path! In this 1248 part series I will....

I've always thought I could come up with conspiracy theories for stuff, but it turns out I don't have the mental energy to think up something fake that sounds plausible to me.

FBI agent: So… do you know how we caught you? Criminal mastermind: Honestly, no idea. I really thought it was the perfect crime. FBI: We used URLs to track your user activity and gather data. CM: [slams fist on table] GODDAMNIT! I knew I forgot something.