Amish Super Model

Still struggling to find a scarier and more evil Halloween costume…

Remember when the President and Musk canceled USAID and left people unfed while crops died in the fields and then gave farmers an $8 billion payoff?

Trump: I’ve never had sex with miners! Press: No, Mr. Trump, have you ever had sex with “MINORS”… like girls under 18? Trump: Oh, well, yes, definitely!

Republicans, they're not like us.

Women who vote Republican ignore the sexism so they can enjoy the racism.

BREAKING: GOP Congress pushes to keep name “Department of War Crimes”

Please, spay and neuter your bigots.

TRUMP HAS ALWAYS SOLD PARDONS TRUMP AND ELON HAVE STOLEN BILLIONS

📌There's no way all this is just some damn coincidence: 1. Ukraine whacks Russia. 2. Lindsey Graham leads bipartisan efforts hitting Russia w/ more sanctions. 3. Graham suddenly drops dead. (Like so many of Putin's enemies.) 4. Trump immediately cancels sanctions, and buys Russian diesel. <more>

I wish I was rich and pretty enough to have a job as a “socialite.”

Smoking some trout on a beautiful Sunday…

I'm tired. Life is short. Go chase waterfalls, if you must. Fear the reaper, he is kinda scary. If Argentinians want to cry for me, let them. I'm just trying to get through my own life each day. I have no bandwidth left to police what other people should or shouldn't do. ✌️

It’s an important developmental milestone, regardless of generation, to teach children to play the drum solo from “In the Air Tonight” on the steering wheel of a vehicle every time they hear it.

Sorry, I didn’t mean to punch you in the face. I was only trying to hit your mute button.

After the recent Trump rallies, it's a novelty to see a president able to fill a venue again.

I have a dream… That one day people will care about children the way they care about embryos.

I bet the architect who designs those “Special Places in Hell” is really getting ready to cash in.

AI will take your job. Don't wait till the last minute to tell your boss to fuck off.

My sister said she's never once seen me admit that I'm wrong. I was obliged to remind her of that one time in 1978.

I only used Temu once back in 2023. My order is expected to arrive next week.

👀👀👀

the only white people in the US scared to show their faces are klansmen, nazis, and ICE agents

if you're fat enough the tasers won't do anything

Two paths diverged in the woods, And I took the path most rooted.

People are driving like assholes and it’s making it difficult to write my posts

Man, I miss Obama! Brilliant, inspiring, AND complete sentences.

Elon is a criminal 👇

Vivek Ramaswamy thinks childhood sexual abuse is a character flaw. Being a colossal asshole, apparently, is not.

Hey Elon, I have a message for you. Representative Jim Himes

Poverty is a policy decision. Concentrated wealth is a policy decision. Inequality is a policy decision. Remember this.

My skeets are funnier if you have something wrong with you

Careful, that’s my load bearing delusion

Me: This Genital Tso’s chicken tastes like dick!

There is no grift so blatant that MAGA won't ignore or shrug off. Trump and his cronies can do anything as long as they don't turn into Hillary, Biden or Obama. $50 million for a billionaire pardon based solely on her access to Trump.

"There's a museum near here." "Any good restaurants?" "Also, a fantastic old church." "Does it say where we should eat?" "We can also take a walking tour." "I feel like I'm not being heard, Martin.”

In 2020, Jared Kushner was senior advisor to the president of the United States, a full-time employee of the United States government, and was subject to numerous disclosure requirements and ethical restrictions under the Ethics in Government Act of 1978.