Closed Guard and Chill

Hanging out.

ill be fucking their little tri-corn hat wearing asses up. founding fathers never saw brazilian jui jitsu. Never saw muy thai. im putting ben franklin in a kimura.

Teenagers are weird because you have a kid for 14 years and then one day it’s like woah who is this giant person in my house.

Sorry but I won’t be guilt tripped because I never heard a particular country song. Nope! Will not happen! GTFO of here with that shit!!

If you ever feel bad about yourself, remember this about me: a turning point in my life was discovering that if i slowly chewed my food instead of swallowing huge amounts of air while gulping everything down, I wouldn’t get horrible stomachaches after every meal. I made this discovery at age 41.

My reaction when I read those posts from SEs complaining that Claude has ruined their job. 

Can't believe I have to learn the name of another strait.

I'm pro-AI but anti-datacenter. I'm OK with them making the super AI that decides to kill humanity or whatever. Just do it on the computers we already have laying around, that's my only ask.

Maybe all our problems are due to the fact that they no longer do Freaknik? Worth considering.

If 9/11 was 25 years ago then I'm old as fuck. No other thoughts.

This song is way better than it has any right to be. www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LLb...

They killed Shelob when she was just trying to make some money to feed her daughters.

AI upscaling just never looks right to me.

I figured out what’s been going wrong with America. It’s not our divisive politics. It’s too many brands of flavored seltzer. There are too many options and it’s driving us all insane. We need to cut this down to two or three max and usher in the next age of prosperity.

Wow Trump's poll numbers are down, this is certainly something that will be permanent and not bounce right back once something good randomly happens or stupid people just forget that he made the bad things happen! Said the most gullible people ever!!!

I regret to inform my American friends that Iceland’s hot dog game is unusually strong.

One of the hardest things about growing up is realizing you’re never going to stumble on that one activity that comes so easily to you that you’re an expert instantly despite everyone else finding it really difficult.

Oh no not my beloved crypto account

👇👇👇

No one's saying it so I will: this trophy is very ugly.

wizards prepare spells to cast each day. for example if a wizard wants to cast penis explosion, they have to memorize the spell ahead of time. whereas a sorcerer can cast penis explosion any time as long as they already know the spell

My mayor Muslim My bagel Jewish My apprentice Darth Maul The Jedi must fall

when you’re already having a bad day and then you find out you’re not the leader in Oat Science 😕

That parody of me you all find so amusing is in fact based on several incorrect assumptions.

Thank you for letting me know, meteorologist Mike Rizzo.

Where the hood, where the hood, where the hood at? Asking for a friend.

@numetalmoment.bsky.social June 14th NY Times Sunday crossword. Easiest answer ever.

They could have just scored all those points earlier in the game and saved everyone a lot of anxiety.

While the rest of you are chanting "DE-FENSE!", I'm changing "Go Robert Mueller and the rule of law!"

I remember him from Live’s “Lightning Crashes”

It’s an honor just to be nominated.

Note to all businesses: I will not provide feedback, I will not fill out a survey, if I have thoughts about my experience you will not be privy to them, leave me alone!!

saying you love Ra when you only have one obelisk is crazy

I normally advise staying off reddit but the ireland subreddit is good for anyone.

Doing real shit

Wow that’s really unfortunate ma’am I’m sorry to hear that. Also, what the fuck?

Hantavirus this, hantavirus that…I’m about to take my hand ta YOUR dumb ass.

I think what really freaks people out about AI is that it highlights that technology can drastically change our lifestyles and livelihoods at the drop of a hat, and the people driving that change are often very scummy.

New Yorkers originally started calling him “Rudy Giuliani” because he was very rude to everyone (we’re also generally rude so this was considered a compliment).

Giuliani’s only crime was loving his country too much.

Guys, just summon Captain Planet as soon as you see the bad guy. Stop wasting time with the other bullshit that never works. “Oh my ring lets me talk to monkeys.” WGAF? Call the 7’ tall blue guy who is invulnerable and can fly, idiot.

How come if you put soup in the microwave you can have it in there for 10 mins and the bowl is volcanic but the soup is still cold? Can we arrest James Comey for this?

What do y'all think of my hat design?

Ragdoll cats are really funny they will sit next to you and roll over so you can rub their belly and just roll right off the side of the couch / bed. Somehow we bred a creature so relaxed it's a danger to itself.

We call them wildlife, but a lot of them live in the suburbs. They’re suburblife.

Life tip: a big difference between chain organic bougie grocery stores is their quality of candy. Trader Joes has really good candy you can't find anywhere else. Whole Foods's candy aisle is complete bullshit. Some sugar free crap that no one likes and a bunch of raw cashews. Fuck you!

The best spectator sport is two white belts doing Brazilian Jiu-jitsu, don’t argue with me I brought receipts.

I never did that, dummy.