Dan Persons

Jeff Bezos: "No, no. I'll stand here at the edge of the frame so I can be easily cropped out once the inquests begin."

I wonder how many people are going to Trump rallies just for the opportunity to see a President in the flesh? And then five minutes in, it's, "Okay, we saw the President. Who's up for McDonald's?"

Amazing news! The Princess Who Saved Herself was just selected by AI New Orleans SHORTS via FilmFreeway.com! My first fest!

Tonight's Rachel Maddow, at approx 20:55, the shot of City Hall in Philadelphia: I'm all the way over on the left side, facing away from the camera, in the black windbreaker with the curved logo. Fame at last.

A version of *6*, except instead of Henry VIII's wives, it's Melania, Ivanka, Natalie Harp, Laura Loomer, Kristi Noem, and Katie Zacharia.

Note: Jonathan is not a turtle.

I'm attending No Kings's event, “No Kings: Vote Early Philadelphia” - sign up now to join me! The idea is to show up in such numbers that any attempt to declare the election fraudulent look ridiculous. I'll be showing up to send the message. www.mobilize.us/nokings/even...

"When it comes to killing Nazis, maybe that ain't such a bad thing." It isn't always true that our pop culture is a reflection of our times, but... youtu.be/aQrxHLuqJCk?...

Happy birthday, @markhamillofficial.bsky.social! What beats out being a Jedi? Being a *mensch.*

You don't understand. From his point of view, *any* intelligence is a super intelligence.

Incredible Facebook slop ad I just got

I say let's throw him a bone. There's this great little entertainment center on Connecticut Ave NW. Let him put his name on that.

Welcome back, Senator McConnell.

YES! YES! www.nytimes.com/live/2026/09...

Lawyers out there: In his speech in Dallas, Trump exhorted his supporters to "cheat like hell" in the coming election. Could that quote be used in the coming court battles to prove that the post office rules on ballots are not actually about ensuring a fair election?

As what? As what? A tempest in a teapot? A limited-time offer? A swiftly tilting planet? DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING.

threads.com/@badgirlart

I would like a list of the stores that will be selling Trump's cut-rate mystery meat. So I can avoid them.

There, that's better...

"I don't want to say" = "I don't know" or "We don't actually have any deal."

Between 60 - 80 hours over three weeks, 10,000 words of prompts, and the nagging suspicion that for all the infrastructure, acreage, and chips plowed into it, the machine should at least know what happens when a dragon's tail is wrapped around a tree. But here it is... youtu.be/im64ABZKhxg?...

EYES ON THE ROAD, MIKE.

I want to publish a book wrapped in human skin of recipes for yummy snacks and call it *The Necronom-nom-nom.*

Kuleshov Effect : film :: Schrödinger's Cat : Quantum Physics

"But they will fight onward." I love when he slips into "Is I talkin' presidential?" mode.

There may be a good reason why they got demonetized. My review is up now! open.substack.com/pub/cinemati...

Cinema Rule: The only reason for your Monster-That's-Not-Actually-a-Monster to have magical healing powers is for the fake death in act three.

There is no truth to the legend that the original title of *The Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz* was *Oy, Canada!*

Cartoon by Monte Wolverton

New England, Ancient Terrors. Here's my review. open.substack.com/pub/cinemati...

So what are you doing in Philly in August? How about... www.eventbrite.com/e/clay-zombi...

Grindr has ordered all handkerchiefs to be flown at half-mast.

PHILADELPHIA What're you doing August 19th? Tickets going on sale soon!

@olbermann.bsky.social: Every Monday & Thursday I feel the heartbreak. Your health comes first, always. Is this the end of the podcast? Are you ever coming back?

When you shake hands with an alien named Brian, you may never let go. cinematicsqueak.substack.com/p/touch-me

A $3 @mta.info subway fare and some good Q train timing can buy you one hell of a view of the July 4th fireworks and the Brooklyn Bridge light show! Huge shoutout to the train operator for slow rolling over the Manhattan Bridge and the conductor for announcing it.

People are expressing puzzlement about Trump's plan to deliver an extensive speech starting at 9 PM. I don't think it's an accident. This from Google AI. I can't wait 'til they discover this ain't 1930's Germany.

Whole Foods had ice cream on sale for 50% off. The freezer section looked like a horde of Mongols had passed through.

Remember how, like, fifteen years ago there were all those stories about how young evangelicals were less concerned about abortion and homosexuality and more interested in feeding the poor and helping the homeless? Where did all those young evangelicals go?

WANT TO SNORFLE THE MURDERCAT (🔊 up)

Real science fiction lives! open.substack.com/pub/cinemati...

Please let one of the side effects be excessive nose hair growth. newrepublic.com/post/212206/...

Did he watch the opening ceremony? Did he see Bono and Jennifer Hudson and Stevie Wonder and Bruce? Did he feel the star power? Could he feel the joy? Did realize how cheap and hollow his blood match was? Did his soul wither just a bit? I'll bet he was watching. Not sure about the rest.

A) Spider-Men B) Spider-Mans C) Spiders-Man

Kraft has introduced a new Mac & Cheese, saying it's full of protein. Which means that the original Mac & Cheese...

Sung to the tune of the *Secret Agent* theme: Here's my Uber ride, Here's my Uber ride. I've given him a number, And taken away his name.

HEY, HOW'S TRUMP COPING WITH THE SOUNDCHECK ON HIS STADIUM? GOTTA TAKE THE CREW HOURS TO GET THINGS SET UP RIGHT, INNIT? DO THEY DO IT DURING THE DAY? OVERNIGHT? DOES HE LOVE HEARING THE J6 CHOIR BEING PLAYED OVER AND OVER AND OVER?