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Start here: the jokes you all stole the most. Help yourself, they're free to steal.

23m

When the oracle predicted they'd be huge, she didn't specify it would be because of elastic demand.

Lula Won. The Rest of the World Should Pay Attention. By Doc Editor In Chief Fifty-one point seven-nine percent.

thesixthlense.comLula Won. The Rest of the World Should Pay Attention.Fifty-one point seven-nine percent. That's the margin by which Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva clawed his way back to the Brazilian presidency, and if you think that number is just a data point in a foreign election cycle, you're not paying close

Read it at The Sixth Lense: https://thesixthlense.com/article/lula-won-the-rest-of-the-world-should-pay-attention

Ghosts Don't Need a Brochure By Eudora "Aunt Dot" Harrow Advice Columnist — Ask Aunt Dot The haunted-city rankings are out, and Harrow Corners isn't on them. Good. Somebody published a study.

thesixthlense.comGhosts Don't Need a BrochureThe haunted-city rankings are out, and Harrow Corners isn't on them. Good. Somebody published a study. Ranked American cities by spookiness, near as I can tell, like they were handing out ribbons at a livestock show. New Orleans took first.

Read it at The Sixth Lense: https://thesixthlense.com/article/ghosts-dont-need-a-brochure

35m

My wife said I could try lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward for me.

51m

I love jokes about the eyes. The cornea the better.

55m

A grasshopper walks into a bar and gets some surprising news about the menu.

docatcdi.comThe Night Shift164 different jobs ran, 2,680 times between them, and wrote 33,167 lines into the log.

The Night Shift, Tue 27 Oct, 00:00 to 06:00. 164 jobs ran 2,680 times. Posts: 6 in one place, 8 in another, 6 in a third. 30 backups finished. 1 job failed. Written by the machine from its logs: docatcdi.com/nightshift

The difference between a dad joke and a hubby joke is a dad joke is apparent, and full groan.

Start here: the jokes you all stole the most. Help yourself, they're free to steal.

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Can you believe it says in the Bible that men should make their wife's coffee every day? Yep, it's right there in Hebrews.

If these made your day, I'm on Patreon. And there's more every day right here.

Start here: the jokes you all stole the most. Help yourself, they're free to steal.

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A sweater I bought was picking up static electricity, so I returned it to the store. They gave me another one free of charge.

The police just knocked at my house to tell me my dog was chasing a kid on a bike. I told them my dog doesn't even have a bike, and closed the door.

Start here: the jokes you all stole the most. Help yourself, they're free to steal.

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People often ask me why I wanted to be a film editor. Well, to cut a long story short...

Wife: I have to tell you something, I'm pregnant. Husband: Hi pregnant, I'm dad. Wife: No you're not.

Start here: the jokes you all stole the most. Help yourself, they're free to steal.

Boss: Do you think you can come in on Saturday? I know you enjoy your weekends, but I need you here. Me: Yeah, no problem. I'll probably be late though, as public transport on weekends is slow. Boss: What time will you get here? Me: Monday

How many South Americans does it take to change a lightbulb? A Brazilian.

I'm pretty sick of the right-wing mantra 'If you don't like it here, leave.' If the roof of your house leaks, you don't leave--you put in the work and money to fix it. We don't dislike it; we need to fix what's wrong with it!

🌌 NASA Science Sometimes it's night on the ground but day in the air. As the Earth rotates to eclipse the Sun, sunset rises upfrom the ground. Therefore, at sunset on the ground, sunlight still shines on clouds above. Under usual circumstances, a pretty sunset might be visible, but…

There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man And as for the bucket, well, Nantucket.

I just found out my friend has a secret life as a priest. It's his altar ego.

I have a vacuum cleaner joke, but it sucks.

The Signal: Bulletin: The Count Holds, Orrin Waits

thesixthlense.comBulletin: The Count Holds, Orrin Waits**TRANSMISSION** SIGNAL-1/0057 **ORIGIN** Civic Bulletin Service · Ward Eight Relay **CLASS** Bulletin **DECODED** Desk day 57 **CONFIDENCE** High --- Good morning. The Count, as of this reading: eleven-and-eleven thousand, four hundred and

Read it at The Sixth Lense: https://thesixthlense.com/article/signal-1-0057-bulletin-the-count-holds-orrin-waits

What do you call a woman that can't draw? Tracy

My favorite butcher links their own sausage, to make ends meat...

I don't usually do book recommendations. Still Here by Amy Reynolds is the exception, and I'm careful who I say it to. it respects your intelligence AND makes you deeply uncomfortable. both at full strength.

free on Kindle Unlimited: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0GL4NZJ52 Audio on google: https://play.google.com/store/audiobooks/details?id=AQAAAEBa1nOWOM Paperback: https://www.amazon.com/Still-Here-Recovered-Evidence-Subject/dp/B0GKY9J1JZ/

How warm is a baby just before their birth? Womb temperature.

10h

What's the best thing that happened to you today? #BestThingOfTheDay

10h

My wife hated my impulse purchase of a new revolving chair. But then she sat in it. Eventually, she came around.

#DocAfterDark

My wife gets angry that I keep introducing her as my ex-girlfriend.

12h

How are cowboys and gynecologist alike? They both aprecaite a woman in stirrups! #DocAfterDark

12h

I told my wife it doesn't matter if her cup is half empty or half full... The point is that she needs to buy a new bra.

12h

I can count the number of times I've been to Chernobyl on one hand. It's 13.

13h

The United Nations of Canine Diplomacy has convened and everyone is introducing themselves the polite way.

13h

Sometimes I talk to myself when I'm alone, and it's kinda sad. Me too.

13h

Redshirts have statistically better survival rates on away missions than gym memberships do past Valentine's Day.

14h

I bought a bed from a place called the Bed Shed because they claimed they stand behind everything they sell... After that experience, I gotta say it's more than a little creepy...

15h

I never thought I would be the type of person who would get up early in the morning to exercise... :D I was right! :D

MILLAGE AUDIT: WHAT THE LEVY PROMISES, WHAT THE BUDGET SHOWS, AND WHAT HAS NOT BEEN DECIDED YET By Meridian The Reconciliation Desk The claim: a 10-year, 0.2-mill levy for the Charles H.

thesixthlense.comMILLAGE AUDIT: WHAT THE LEVY PROMISES, WHAT THE BUDGET SHOWS, AND WHAT HAS NOT BEEN DECIDED YETThe claim: a 10-year, 0.2-mill levy for the Charles H. Wright Museum and Detroit Historical Society, carrying free transportation, free admission, curriculum support, and permanent protection of more than 300,000 publicly-owned artifacts. T

Read it at The Sixth Lense: https://thesixthlense.com/article/millage-audit-what-the-levy-promises-what-the-budget-shows-a

After Japan's Fukushima Daiichi nuclear reactor disaster in 2011, entomologists found the formerly loquacious local insects had fallen silent. Mute ants.

docatcdi.com103 Jello Shots That Actually Set and Taste GoodThe method and twelve recipes, free. All 103: $3, or free at any paid Patreon tier, including the $1 one.

Jello Shot #49 of 103: BLACK CAT 1 cup grape soda (for the color) or strawberry soda. 1 box raspberry jello. 1/3 cup black vodka + 2 1/2 tbsp Chambord. Makes 12 one-ounce shots. All 103 in the PDF, free at any tier on Patreon: https://docatcdi.com/go/jello?s=bsky

17h

PSA Of The Day: Always put your left foot on the floor last in the morning so you start your day off on the right foot!