Maximum Goonch

Extremely funny that the latest two Metroid games are Metroid: Fear and Metroid: Hunger

Frankenstein Delivering a TED Talk "For decades, man has known it is possible to turn one living guy into two dead guys." Activates comically large guillotine, scream interrupted by SLORP sound "But science has long believed it is impossible to turn two dead guys into one living guy. UNTIL NOW!"

francis fukuyama is no longer asking.

My most cynical conspiracy theory is that a bunch of billionaires realized that that Andy Warhol line about Coke also mostly applied to consumer electronics, and, incensed by this perceived enforced egalitarianism, determined that the poors shouldn't have good PCs anymore.

I need everyone to remember and to understand: You do not "Need" AI for anything. It didn't exist six or seven years ago. Everybody still did their jobs just fine. You didn't need it then and you don't need it now. You can just not use it, and you should not use it.

If I have to listen to another Brit talk about how their houses are "Built to retain heat" as if that isn't true of every house outside the tropics I'm going to scream. Insulation. It is called insulation. And it works on the cold too. Just get an AC, you are all being ridiculous.

Every human being on earth should play The 100 Line Last Defense Academy. I've never seen a game that has this much peak and this much ass in a single story.

I can't believe they sacrificed Lindsay Graham to keep Mitch McConnell alive like The Emperor in Warhammer 40K.

Alright I was wrong about Platner. But I was not wrong to defend him at the time. Aesthetics. Are. Not. Policy.

Looking for art made prior to the mass adoption of AI like I'm a diver hunting for ship wrecks from before 1945 so I can get the steel that isn't contaminated by radiation

i cant get the phrase "foul homestuckian tricknology" off my mind cuz of this shit

Hey it's me, the midboss monster with really tough armor that takes a big ole heavy breath before I shoot fire or a laser or something. I really hope nobody throws a bomb into my mouth while I'm doing that.

Andrew Hussie parted the Red Sea so that Toby Fox could come back from the dead.

oh yeah, in terms of good news- I haven't seen anyone talking about this??? In short- worst case scenario of 4C warming by 2100 is no longer possible, new worst-case is 2.8C now DOES NOT MEAN we just relax- the only way we got here is through hard work- but it means THE HARD WORK IS WORKING

America - A Country That Sucks, Full Of People Who Rule

Power outage knocked me offline for 2 days and I come back to "Elon is the world's first trillionaire." No he isn't. That money's not real. It exists in the imaginations of algorithms and speculators and nowhere else.

Very convenient that we're starting to suddenly get lots of DA allegations about Platner after the rest of the playbook failed to drop his numbers and ONLY after that.

Every Latin American election result lately is either "This is Emilio Gonzales he was a community leader for 20 years and he wants to unionize the beef industry." or "This is Juan Geraldo Perez Gustavo de Silva and he tortures animals for fun and wants to reintroduce the Sugar Plantations."

I don’t know if it was the very first but the one that comes to mind immediately is the dogs in Where The Red Fern Grows that book fucked me up real bad as a kid

Given the state of things, if you want to protect your own free expression and that of people you actually care about you are straight up gonna have to defend shit that deeply morally offends you, grosses you out, or even possibly induces trauma depending on your life experiences.

The belief in trans rights entering the median voters body as Trump makes gas cost $8/gallon

hot take: i like it when people say "a dracula" instead of "a vampire"

Discord confused after huge number of channels have age restrictions removed. "No idea why this is happening," says one dipshit at the service.

People are always reacting to the knowledge that there's sixteen year olds alive now who were born in 2010 with shock or dread and that's the wrong response. It's obviously the case that that would be true. It's not surprising. It's immoral. How dare they.

Donald Trump could demand Hakeem Jeffries first born son from him and he'd put his hands on his hips, thrust out his chin and go "I'll only give you half of him."

Deep Gock Re-Lactic

i just got a new job at Bluesky Inc. where my job is i'm the person who decides if your links embed successfully on Discord or not. on a good day i spend about 7.5 hours on the toilet

I don't know who needs to hear this right now but it is always worth repeating that nothing will improve your own life like treating other people with kindness and respect regardless of whether they deserve it. The only thing we cannot tolerate is people who suck so bad they'd make this illegal.

"I'm looking for a new fantasy anime, is this one Dragon Quest or Wizardry." I explain to the Isekai Man what Dragon Quest and Wizardry are. He Laughs. "It's a very nice anime sir." Look inside. It's Dragon Quest.

An ICE Agent murdered a woman for absolutely no reason except the sexual thrill in broad daylight in front of cameras and they are trying to convince you it was self defense. "Abolish ICE" is now a euphemism as far as I'm concerned. Very bad things should happen to everyone in this organization.

I had a very strong hunch right from the start that this was just going to be a "Surgical strike" followed by a cringe ass victory parade because Donald Trump fundamentally does not have the nuts to do a real war.

tags: female_pervert

Hey, yeah it's me. Single classic RPG monster that inflicts an extremely rare and annoying status effect that you'd never build to resist and the cure-all item doesn't work on. Yeah. So anyway you're a frog now.

me playing doom 3 on a sumerian tablet: i can't see a thing, i'll open this one

The One Piece Fandom deserves it's own Sickos.jpg

Every time there's a high profile shooting the entire Right Wing acts out the plot of Dexter except instead of trying to prove he's the killer they're desperately searching for evidence he's not white.

It is incredibly funny to see all of the Checkmark Libs going "Gun Violence is Never Okay, Pensive Emoji." while every single normal citizen is going "I hope Charlie Kirk shit his pants when he went down. I hope he gassed out the whole crowd."