silly goose

i love bread. it doesn’t matter if it’s christ or not i’m not picky

Social anxiety is a turn-on. Like yeah babe let’s leave

at this point we need a button on the remote for “not quite mute” so i can switch between dialogue volume and explosions volume

how do i turn on subtitles for my audiobooks

New cryptid

making deal with the devil sacrificing my firstborn child then getting a vasectomy

the reason AI costs so much water is bc it’s full of shit. and it cant poop without peeing

are we sure the robot doesn’t have feelings or did we just teach it that it’s a robot and robots don’t have feelings just kidding. it’s a robot of course it doesnt have feelings lol

“spot me a fiver i’ll be your driver!” -> “give me twenty. maybe we’ll get there”

youre telling me cereal killed these people?

seriously why are teeth and eyeballs not a part of health insurance. like do they think it’s an optional luxury to see and eat

it was me i stole the 12 tons of kitkats

now i can finally rest

one day jensen huang will eat an RTX 5090 live like the mcdonald’s ceo and someone will ask “can you taste the transformers” and he will just say yes and the stock will go up

we’ll burn that bridge when we get there

youre always going one way on a one way street. no matter which direction

i have no butt but i must fart

aTaT upside down kinda looks like an AT-AT

fuck nazis

why is bread called pain when it gives me so much pleasure

filmmakers subtly nodding to everybody about everything

me: *worried my boss thinks im using ai* my boss: *worried im not using ai*

BIG FIGHT AT POLAND’S WROCLAW ZOO!!!

major depression is on the rise. but he still has a lot of work to do if he’s going to get promoted and unseat general anxiety

i have to delete everything. i thought this was Notes app. i’m so cooked

if anyone ever makes @centerfold.bsky.social evil again, i will evil. do not

it’s like when a genius is too early. they wouldnt serve Mozart at Wendy’s at 3am either I guess

i came here because insta posts stopped embarrasing me in the morning. i crave embarrasment from *swirls bsky* damn why is it giving early 2000s flipphone carrier