Rich

I just saw an ad for Scream 7. I’m so old (and out of touch).

Bet that Man Utd haircut guy can’t wait for Conte.

Earth-kun, the Tokyo Sewerage Bureau mascot, is a globe with a manhole cover hat.

If spurs were still in the Levy era and Ipswich went down, we would totally be sniffing round Enciso.

Sounds super sustainable to me.

This is fucked. Really bleak how entrenched this is becoming.

I wonder if in 100 years, many people will still care about The Beatles in the same crazy way?

In the office today. Three blokes sat around talking about their protein intake.

It’s been a really rough last ten days, I really needed that tonight Spurs. #COYS

Stick that in your pipe and fuck off Alan Smith.

Injuries. How I’ve missed you.

I’ve missed Madders so much.

Understandably so. Or do you mean “in critical condition”?

My hobby around 1995 was to blink at the same frequency as the clock on the VCR but out of phase, so that I would only see the digits lit up. Spent hours of my life on that.

Just seen seven magpies lads.

Had too much coffee. Now I understand why crackheads walk the way they do.

Wouldn’t it be beautiful if City PSG ended up 1-15…

@sebsb.bsky.social I think you’re spot on about Dele by the way.

Very minor gripe in the grand scheme of things, but drivers flagging up Highways Agency Traffic Officers as police on Google Maps is amateur.

Imagine being a child in the hospital and looking out your window to see an entire football stadium waving at you. 🥹❤️ This is the Hawkeye Wave at the University of Iowa, a beautiful tradition since 2017 for the children at UI Stead Family Children’s Hospital. #SheShed

Pro tip: when a close relative is having an operation, don’t look up the mortality rate.

I reckon my experience of Facebook marketplace is totally polarised. About 50% of people seemingly don’t understand the basics of communication.

I'll never get tired of posting this clip of Skillet’s John Cooper blasting for Jesus… christiannightmares.substack.com/subscribe

How soon can the plague get here?

Having some mad AF dreams at the moment. Tuesday night I was smoking crack with one of the bosses at work. Last night my phone got bricked, I got an axe to the stomach and had to walk around for hours before I could go to the hospital.

Why does every single online order I make automatically opt me in to giving feedback about “my experience”? Surely this falls foul of GDPR? I just want my stuff man 😂

The Bear, but nobody is allowed to shout.

The Bear just got worse and worse with every season.

Wordle 1,932 3/6 ⬛⬛⬛⬛🟩 ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Today I was the person in the supermarket who accidentally knocked a box of eggs on to the floor.

Amateur move making Richard E Grant a traitor

Ffs, got another cold.

Little fucker (phew)

Going out shortly to look for a lost cat who hasn’t been seen since last night.

Absolutely no chance mate.

Why does Wes Streeting always look like he’s trying to talk his way out of a lie?

Would Jamiroquai have made it if his name was Oh?

Amolrajan sounds like some sort of antifungal cream.

William Shakefuckspeare

Wait, did I just see Romesh Ranganathan on ITV?!

Just realised that all Taylor Swift lyrics sound like Real Housewives taglines to me.

I swear Tim Sherwood’s epitaph is going to be “I gave Harry Kane his chance”.

10/10. No notes.

Siri, show me *brass neck*

Disappointed this isn’t about tiles tbh

My idea of hell is a teams meeting of thirty people and everyone has multiple questions they enter into the chat.

Listening to some sales wanker on a call while I’m in the vet’s waiting room. Sounds like an awful way to live your life.

People who enjoy snus are only ever one spelling mistake away from disaster.