Rambler

This administration specializes in fearmongering, not facts. The facts: 86% of trans youth report s*cidal ideation and 56% have attempted to end their lives. Anti trans laws increase attempts by ~72%. <1% report regretting GAC. If they are trying to protect children, science says they are wrong.

Every year, I am tasked with making White Castle stuffing for Thanksgiving at the 'rents house. Every year, I suspect the official recipe was written in collaboration with Big Celery. Kids... don't use that much celery. Less than half, and saute it to "tender crisp" or it'll end up super crunchy.

Welp. We got Covid in this house right now. Try to stay safe out there. Get your shots. Wear a mask.

Just wrapped the ribs for phase two of the cook. Smoker is holding steady temps after I sealed it up a bit better. I'm on my lanai watching temps and listening to the Cuban music drifting over from my neighbors. Cold beer in hand, right now I've allowed/created a very rare moment of peace.

Last week, our car's rear suspension failed, and the car decided to "auto-Carolina squat. It cost way more to fix than I would have liked. But my mechanic shop is always fair, and the owner Sam sent me home with frozen wild boar sausage his family hunted. His 7 year old killed the invasive boar.

The secret is holding.

I've dissected the ham, split it into two containers, and back in the oven.

My wife has been texted details of the crisis. She's sitting like a statue amidst the unsuspecting would-be diners.

Mom is out there chatting and drinking. I'm alone in the kitchen holding dark secrets and occasionally fingering the ham.

She said, "just a few minutes" after putting it back in the oven. It will not be just a few minutes.

I'm in danger.

I've been ordered not to tell my father.

The table is set. Wine is poured. Dishes are out. She asked me to carve the ham. Kids... we have porcine snowcones. Ice crystals halfway in.

When we showed up, Mom was putting the ham in the oven. Dad asked if she was SURE it was thawed. Mom was firm that it was. Dad said she took it out of the freezer at eleven. It was just past two.

Shit I'm embroiled in an Easter ham crisis.

I didn't hear the grinder when The Boss of Cats and Men was in the kitchen earlier and went to check the coffee machine to be sure she'd have go juice when she wakes, and the machine beeps hard at me when I pull out the tray like, "yeah bud, cute, but how 'bout you leave this to the professionals?"

I'm just a lil guy, but this is one of my favorite accounts here. You should all follow it if you don't.

Huh, if this is the conservative's tack, maybe Stein and the Green Party are really just total vote stealing bullshit after all. 🤔

Some good legal news: The conservative 11th Cir. unanimously struck down Florida’s Stop WOKE Act as violative of the 1st Amendment. The state cannot forbid private employers from having training programs on race and diversity, as the Act required. Sorry, DeSantis. It’s a hard no.

Last year, the local drought had the yard squirrels steal every single strawberry from my hydroponic towers while they were still white. 80 plants were completely robbed. This year is shaping up to be FAR better for yields and shortcake chances.

!jazbot whereami

We spend a lot of time telling kids that they can be whoever they want to be, but I think it might be more important to tell them that they can be who they are

Anserine [AN-suh-rahyn] (adj.) -Pertaining to a goose; goose like. -Silly/goofy/stupid/foolish In a sentence: “The anserine antics of Angilo Anbertini, aided by an ancillary able-bodied accomplice, afforded abundant accolades among his ardent admirers and aficionados of aeronautical acrobatics.”

weed, sluts, bitches, jesus. long ago, the four nations lived together in harmony. then, everything changed when the jesus nation attacked.

Everyone knows there are only seven plots in the world: Meet cute. Body swap. Putting the crew back together for one last heist. Oops, now you’re the boss/Queen/President. Grandfather paradox. Collect magic widgets. The Waynes get shot in Crime Alley. That’s it. All the plots.

31 years ago this extraordinary woman burned her career and life to the ground to speak out against a horrific, massive crime against children. And she was a hell of an artist. A blazing soul. RIP

A little Santa in July at Busch Gardens Tampa yesterday. My wife got me the amazing shirt. The elf is named Pixel and she's amazing. Big Red One and I go waaaay back.

alien: I'll rule you all with an iron fist me: our leaders already do that alien: well then I'll strip your planet of its resources me: you're not gonna believe this