Ol' Simpkin

Come on, everybody! Post HARDER!!

HOT MILFS in YOUR AREA are TURNING THEIR CLOCKS BACK

You think that's cunt you're serving?

Is he wrong though?

knowing how to turn $2.39 worth of ingredients into a delicious, nutritious meal feels like a form of alchemy

you interrupted my cat's quinceañera for this??

I'm glad Obama rallied for Abdul because it energizes the base or whatever and I genuinely like Abdul, but man... the libs are going to be insufferable for the next few days

I’m pretty convinced this is a group of people who contribute heavily to the astroturfing of this site and generally make social media unbearable

ok but this is actually an appropriate way to honor Bacchus and i think the ancients would have agreed

No joke. I think this is the most important video I have ever seen about mobile games. This guy breaks down how this game psychologically profiles you, and makes the game harder or easier in order to show you ads

sun's not up yet I'm allowed to be cringe

I wish I was brave enough to go insane

I am awake and sober. Guess I'll make coffee and rawdog this bitch of a reality

when the justice is poetic 😩👌

Toilet spider by my seat, Tell me what it is you eat There are no flies or spider wife Just me, alone, fighting for my life I used to fear you'd bite my ass But now I know you have more class So make your home near my rear-end You're welcome here my toilet friend.

what if all the workers of the world unite? might be worth a try?

Toilet spider by my seat, Tell me what it is you eat There are no flies or spider wife Just me, alone, fighting for my life I used to fear you'd bite my ass But now I know you have more class So make your home near my rear-end You're welcome here my toilet friend.

Wait hold on, I’m still studying the blade

many are calling morning bean "the best part of wakin' up"

[to the tune of Phil Collins' "In The Air"] Party rock is in the house toniiight, oh Lord 🎶

I think ~1.5K is the threshold for following at which I start to question if you're a real person. 2K is still feasible but you should do a little pruning and practice some self restraint or your timeline will be an absolute mess.

[French accent] I am, how you say, bonjour-king le peen.

Ah fuck he killed it

hell isn't real but heaven is but only for spiders and it's Australia

koalafied immunity

"Stop bleeding! YOU'RE RUINING MY JOKE!"

She's such a piece of shit I love her so much

Wise fwom your gwave!

i'm not "pro-vax", I'm a conscientious injector