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In principio erat verbum.

It's the birds man...

🤣

Ha! 🤣🤣🤣

😆🙌🏼👍🏼

This just proves Santa is real

Moms have a connection with Santa!

Paul, the SCOTUS took your privacy in order to kill Roe v Wade. You had Right to Privacy until then and they redefined the 14th in order to eliminate your right to it. Remember the 3 lying during their hearings for SCOTUS that Roe was set law? Trump can pick a liar. Only thing he is good at it seems

My daughter explained it to me when I mentioned I wanted a red bathrobe. “You should talk about it a lot. I’ve learned if you talk about something a lot, Santa brings it to you.”

This just might be the funniest thing I've read in a while. Love it. Thanks 😄

After 1700 years, I’m grandfathered from regulations.

You approved Santa as a data processor when you agreed to the EULA upon birth.

Funny how that happens, huh?

😂😂😂

📌

Mothers are exempt from privacy laws. I don't make the rules.

He's tapped your phone, dude!

He also sees you when you're seeing AND knows when you're awake - the surveillance state has gone too far!

Please don’t give out blockchain use cases to crypto bros so cheaply

The Santa Clause 4: Click Here To Accept The Terms And Conditions

Wasn’t in the original agreement. You should really read the terms and conditions before you agree. Lol

🤣

Big Santa is watching.

Remember, he knows when you're sleeping and when you're awake. 🤔 ... he's a perv!

😆😄

>visit north pole or finland >gdpr consent popup materializes

You need to put your phone in a faraday cage when talking to relatives.

Does he pay import duty on those gifts? For that matter do elves get wages & proper health care? Heaven’s sake has that sled ever passed air worthiness certification

Your mom's an agent for the Deep Sleigh.

Now some Airfryers are listening to your conversations and all of a sudden your feed is full of commercials of things you talked about.

Do you happen to have elves on your shelves?

He sees you when you're sleeping, too I heard. He might be a pervert.

Hey, he knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you’re awake! How would you expect he NOT know about your Christmas wish?!

You should delete your son account

Ditto with all the home intrusions and trespassing.

Santa has data sharing agreements with both google and apple so you've got to leave your phone in the car if you don't want santa hearing it these days

😂

Delete all your (Christmas) cookies!

🌲🍀

Is your mom still living? ‘Cause that would be even more weird?

to be honest his network of spies and informants would make the Stasi jealous.

You usually get bloody adverts on social media the moment you think of something, weird it took a week for you to notice.

You might want to take your mom’s name off your HIPAA Form. 😉

I think your mom blabbed and it got back to Santa.

Privacy is a privilege, don’t you have enough?

To prevent any further mishaps, I suggest you have your mother sign an NDA as soon as possible.

Wanna elaborate.

I thought it was a very nice color... Don't see butt plugs in that range of colors usually..

Your lucky NYT didn't get the scoop on it1 🤭

😂

I would need to view Santa's profile and maybe check CCAP 🎄😁

I wanna know how all these algorithms seem to immediately figure out that I like to see funny and interesting shit? Pretty creepy if you ask me

Can’t believe Santa’s got the surveillance room from the end of The Dark Knight

Same thing going on over here. 😂

Absolutely ridiculous

We did but there's a Clause

Matt Gaetz has hit on a legal way of getting little girls onto his knee, it involves a false white beard a a big red suit

Bro, wait until you find out who was eating all those cookies u left out of Xmas Eve night. (hint: it wasn’t Santa) 🤣🤣🤶

That thing called privacy... is an illusion.

It's almost like he sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake. Creepy.

That’s how you know Santa is real…

🤣🤣🤣

Wouldn’t happen in Europe

not in the next 4 years in the US lol

Curve25519, AES-256, and HMAC-SHA256 are not effective against their systems unfortunately.

This is why Santa loves cookies.

😂😂😂 Happy Christmas🎅🎄🎁🥂 Thank heavens for Moms... she's had a hotline to Santa all your life! 💞🙏

That’s why #Xmas is #magical 🙃

Criminal how much this happens. No loved one conversation is safe.

😂😂😂

NORAD protocol is open by design

Santa is backed by NORAD who publish his annual flight plan, so here we have gvt eavesdropping on the private conversations of ordinary citizens putting together wishlists. This plot runs deeper than you think.

Haha

He sees you, Paul. He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows if you've been bad or good, Paul. He knows everything about you...

But Santa sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake

Finally somebody addressing the real issues

Maybe @wyden.senate.gov can be your Santa this year…

Ok, but, you see the new Hyunjin's hair? Is Just crazy!!! 😍

It is okay, your mum told him