Post

STOP MAKING US FEEL THE NEWS! WE NEED REAL LIFE TO STOP COPYING YOU.

Mine has been so worth it.

Do you have to cut into it to make you cry?

Yo, y'all deadly for this one 🤣

We get the paper edition at our house and absolutely love it. Thank you for bringing a smile to our face.

💯

They paid the mother her $5000 baby bonus before throwing the baby in the DEPORT bin.

Literal spawncamping.

Tell me that this is The Onion being The Onion!

😂😂😂...🥲🥲...🤔🤔...😳😳...😥😥...😢😢...😭😭😭

Thank goodness it’s the Onion! So many times, I think it is and it’s not!

This ☝️

We're almost there

I thought this was real because… well done, Onion.

Satire today, real news soon.

If you have to repost this in a week because it came true then I'm going to be mighty disappointed. Not shocked. But disappointed.

Will Kristi Noem dress up like a Doctor ???? 🤦‍♀️

🤣

I saw this at a hotel once

Lol, that's good. Just cut the embilicul cord with a box cutter and ran off with the kid!

Take this post down! You'll give homan a new approach!

I fully expect that reality will again become indistinquishable from satire here.

They spelled “Gestapo” wrong.

SICK AND TRUE.

Don't give them ideas.

😂😳😬😢

Outrageous

This is DISGUSTING.

Funny/Not funny. Actually, tragically sad commentary.

Well, fuck. Stop giving them ideas.

It’s coming to a delivery room near you!

The baby would be a US citizen. So "deporting" he/she would be wrong. It would be kidnapping.

Sounds so believable…..

It is getting harder to satirise, isn't it? But good job!

Damn near not satire.

Too true and too sad.

Crap! I hadn’t expected to see this come true in less than a week. JFC.

I recently saw Magatha for female MAGA. I liked that. I like names we’re coming up with.

Thanks!

Maybe it’s the father that is the “problem” 🤷‍♀️

🎯

Yes. It's The Onion.

Disgusting

Oh, this is a common misunderstanding. We're worried about the birth rates of *white* children. Hope this helps! /s

Not even satire

Come out with your hands up! … he’s not coming out, get the battering ram!

Eh! Fake news. They dress like this ⬇️

The Onion is satire. The fact that some can’t tell is how far we’ve fallen.

👏🏼

I wish that was irony.

Stephen Miller posted Immigrant's Wanted Posters on white house fence today.

Disgusting 🤬

That’s disgusting and idiotic. Give me a break. I hate what ICE is doing but this is way over the line.

It's also satire that isn't too removed from reality.

They waited! Finally! They’re beginning to show some manners!

Sad but nit unbelievable.

Ouch. Don’t give them any ideas.

A picture is worth….. $$$

Doctor performing C-Section arrested for escorting newborn out the wrong door.

ICE Agents Wait At Edge Of Delivery Table To Deport Newborn --- That is the next step. They just need to make room for enough ICE personell first. It may still be some lack of space in delivery posts.

This isn't even satire anymore. 🤬

I thought this was real

You joke, but it'll happen. Turn off the time machine, dudes.

That doesn't look like a forceps from this angle.

If I had a wife and she was delivering, and she saw them waiting, she'd grab both of them fro their bottom lips, ripping behind their masks, pulling them over their heads, and she'd say "IIIIIIIIIIIII WANT... MORPHINE!"

This will be real news in a matter of days

I thought these were supposed to be satire

Throw em in CE-TOT

Also the pic looks like the back of a cats head instead of open legs

Sounds true

This would be funny if it weren't so easily believable!!

Unfortunately this will probably become true shortly

Especially if she’s a citizen.

This is not it, this is not right , born citizens I thought even at that what is the rush 😳

not satire

For real! 😒

This is hilarious, but please don't give them any ideas.

Yeah, i was going to put “consensual”

Yep I’ve met a few, it is indeed gross!

Ha ha! I love The Onion!

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Funny not funny

Not too far from the present situation, tbh.

Perfect.

Who says they haven't done that?

Somehow, it feels like this one is real. Especially with #PeeWeeGerman lurking.

Scary, huh?

That actually sounds real 😂

tRump is a recurring nightmare

1989 for the simpsons vs. 1998 for penny arcade.

Ouch. Ouch because it's so near the mark.

Is coming 😞

This is true btw I was the baby

Sorry… sorry… sorry…

This is a hell of a thing. I'm really hoping donald trump doesn't "hold my beer" with this one.

And then it became reality... Satire is dead...

Penny Arcade called that spawn camping if I remember correctly.

'Bout sums it.