Diane Messias

Diane Messias

@comedywriter.bsky.social

Triste satirist https://notesfromcuckooisland.blog/2023/05/02/welcome-to-my-world/ DMs not enabled

4.1K followers4.5K following21.2K posts

#Headline of the Day Celebrity claims he will 'kill himself' if allegations of 'inappropriate and exploitative sexual activities with a large number of girls and young women' are published, High Court hears - Mail

#Headline of the Day 'Endless' cruise grinds to a halt after two years at sea with passengers told to disembark as fuel supplies run dry off the coast of Cambodia - Mail

Diane Messias reposted

We got a thousand points of light For the homeless man We got a kinder, gentler machine gun hand We got department stores and toilet paper Got Styrofoam boxes for the ozone layer Got a man of the people, says keep hope alive Got fuel to burn, got roads to drive Keep on rockin' in the free world

theguardian.comNeil Young files second lawsuit against Trump for unauthorised use of Rockin’ in the Free World at ralliesThe musician and outspoken critic of the president is suing for $10m in reputational damages – six years after a settlement in which Trump agreed not to use the song again

#BREAKING Judge reduces indecent assault charge against #RussellBrand to attempted indecent assault After the court hears the four police statements from Russell Brand, the judge tells the jury that separately a charge against the comedian will be changed. 1/

He tells jurors he has concluded "there was insufficient evidence" to support the indecent assault charge and that they should find Brand not guilty of the allegation. #RussellBrand 2/

🧵 People who believe that rejoining to reverse the desperate economic effects of #Brexit would be bad should be sent up to the International Space Station and not allowed to come back down until their IQ has reached a minimum level of double figures.

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#Headline of the Day Former councillor 'advertised online for strangers to sexually assault drugged wife' - Sky News #Surprise of the Day He's a Tory, and not a member of #ReformUK!

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Tommorow, when I will vote for the Joint List (ודם), the only non-Zionist party in Israel, I’ll think of everything that was done in our name More than 70,000 Palestinians were murdered, 20,000+ of them - children I’m voting for my friends that live in Gaza and the West Bank, they can’t vote 💔

Diane Messias reposted

I emailed Patrick Healy, assistant managing editor for standards and trust at NYT, to ask why their story about a House report with new details of rape allegations against the President of the United States included neither those details, nor a single use of the word "rape." archive.is/1s9AM

All those wasted flat roofs...😬

Decoding Fox News@decodingfoxnews.bsky.social

A reporter asked President Trump, "Do you have a further response to Obama who made fun of the Cheesecake Factory, comparing it to the White House and your decorations." Trump gave a fairly long answer.

Diane Messias reposted

Gherkins on toast, gherkin soufflé, gherkin casserole, gherkin fricassée, gherkins à la mode, gherkin curry, devilled gherkins, fondant gherkins, gherkin pie... #Budget

Diane Messias reposted

Michael Atiyah 🇪🇬: Fields Medal 1966 (also Abel Prize 2004), for K-theory. Ahmed Zewail 🇪🇬: Nobel for Chemistry 1999, for his work on femtochemistry. Omar M. Yaghi 🇯🇴: Wolf Prize 2018, Nobel for Chemistry 2025, for his work on reticular chemistry Naguib Mahfouz 🇪🇬: Nobel for literature 1988

The Bulwark@thebulwark.com

RFK: "There's five hundred million Arabs in the world. And yet they don't produce science. They don't win the Nobel Prize. They don't win the Fields Prize. They don't win the Wolf Prize. They don't produce literature."

#Headline of the Day TV! Meghan set to spend weeks in Australia filming new show - and Prince Harry and their children may join her - Mail Is Guy Ritchie directing it? 🤔

#Headline of the Day Reform plan to 'bring back imperial measurements' as party announces list of pledges it says will create jobs - LBC For people who can only count up to 12.* *Aspirational for #ReformUK voters

Diane Messias reposted

This went on for the rest of the full hour, at which point the BBC apologised for having to go to the weather and urged viewers to follow continuing live coverage on iPlayer. Forty-one minutes of unfiltered, unchallenged propaganda by a far right party with 8 MPs, now third in the polls. Discuss.

Alex Andreou@sturdyalex.bsky.social

BBC News just interrupted its coverage to go, live, to Nigel Farage - a man with no contitutional standing in our setup - responding to the budget - a document which nobody has seen yet. WHY