Demon David

I write freehand on a Remarkable. I edit on a computer in Word. I assemble the book in Kindle Create. I publish through Amazon. You would think with all that technology, there wouldn't be typos, but you'd be wrong. Anyway, here's a thing I wrote. a.co/d/067nldVs

I've updated my terms of service. It's now just one word: Tiddies.

20, 20, 24 hours to go I wanna be sedated

And yes. I'm white, middle-age, and (crassly) fairly wealthy but GODDAMMIT I believe in civil disobedience as a correct way for the population to communicate with their parliamentary leaders.

But, hear me out, what if I don't want to see everything?

Doctor Doolittle Between My Legs

Stay-Kashian is everywhere and watchable in my YouTube. Subscribe and share.

Add "Between My Legs" to a movie title. Spartacus Between My Legs.

Not saying you can or should judge people based on so little information, but the woman next to me on this flight, who had a hacking cough and wasn't wearing a mask, watched Fox News the entire time.

That feeling when it's the end of the week and the pill minder isn't empty🤔

Tobacco is bad in so many ways, now including...

Asked a 93 year old if she would call me a young person. She looked hard and said "No." That's fair.

"You Can See Everything" (2026)

This is the message-do not believe it. Vote. Support your neighbors. Stop the bad guys from stealing the American dream. There’s work to do from where we were two years ago but it’s a GREAT PLAN. Vote!

So you're telling me that god, all knowing and omnipresent, only procreated once? I'm not buying it.

Oakland people: who got the best hole-in-the-wall tacos near the convention ctr???

Taxiing at O'Hare, just a tad shorter than the flight time.

My love language is reading your book recommendations and restoring the rights Republicans have taken away from you.

I'm drinking coffee and wearing orthopedic slippers. Happy Friday

I need to restart myself. Anyone want to ctl alt del me?

Rad people in Mississippi: can you direct me to any south Mississippi voting guides? My parents recently moved from Jackson to George county and my mom is looking for some guidance on the local judges & such.

A horse A horse My kingdom for a horse of course

Office advice: Set your out of office message instructing people to contact another out of office person whose instructions say to contact you.

Is it better to be expected, but not invited, or invited, but not expected?

No phone, I'm not in the car driving away from the house, don't connect to it.

I guess I should have been using these the whole time, I say, putting on pants.

I know some of you don't care, but I voted. It's my voice in this mess. Things will and always have changed.

During the filming of Shampoo, Warren Beatty had sex with everyone.

Thank goodness the billionaires will give us space stock and money for fuel.

I'd talk to people, but I don't remember anyone's name.

Call me a dork, but I like people.

Vote. Remember- Men who hate you ARE Voting.

You got to be in it to win it, he said, plunging into the darkness of the void.

Stop, you had me at three-way.

Sunshine go away today I don't feel much like dancing

I mean, I agree, but not the way he thinks. This Washington isn't the solution, it's the problem. He himself is a huge part of the problem and he offers nothing of value.

He’s so smug and proud of himself for his “gotcha” question, and I hope this incident helps him realize that his political/rhetorical role models have inspired him to shit himself stupid across the entire internet

The anti-trans ads are so blatant with the white lady saying “my five kids are the most important thing in the world” instead of “my five kids are the most important thing in the world TO ME” (which would still be bad the way bigots mean it). Anyway, wishing all bigots the life they deserve!

It me, I'm on sale.

Million dollar advertising idea: Planned Parenthood ads on dick pics.

The more desperate they are, the dirtier the tricks.

Winter Garlic, October 2026, 1st attempt

I believe the children are our future I believe the children are also currently our present I also believe the children were our past In short, I'm blaming the children

I was at the podiatrist today and she had a skeletal foot to explain with. I said it was cool and very Halloween. She said she had two rocking chairs on her porch and wanted skeletons for them, but they're expensive and anatomically incorrect!

putting this in a time capsule and being completely baffled by it in 5 years. i ain’t planning to remember shit

Only half a Scaramucci!