Eephus Tosser

1) My allegiance is only to the bit.

Brandon Woodruff (MIL) made his first appearance since July 4th, closing out the game for the Brewers in the 9th inning

Kyle Schwarber would try to bunt right now.

Brewers run-ruling the Rays???

The only bad part is that I'm going to be consigned to eight months of people pretending Pat Murphy is a brilliant observational comic.

Only Josh understands me.

Padres might have been the second-best team in baseball.

boss: did you make a sign for the truck? employees: sure did boss. real fucking sexy just like you asked boss: what?

All the check swing discourse has me thinking about this old sequence of pitches by Sandy Koufax.

I’m not a political journalist, so was gladly surprised at the community I found here last night. To Americans anxious about the upcoming elections, a key thing we learned in Brazil that might help you: DO NOT engage with the far-right online. Don’t share rage bait. Amplify your people. Ignore them.

Is everybody spending eight hours researching all of these candidates and ballot measures or am I just doing it wrong? I swear it never took this long before.

Hell yeah let's fucking go!!!

It's, uh, not the best headline, but I don't feel like dunking on a story of a woman who escaped a cult and an abusive husband. Anyway, fuck Ben Zobrist.

Does the Factory disavow Saddam

You know what I just appreciate them looking.

Imagining this is a post about Salvatore Michael Frelick.

Brewers in October, or as I like to call it: Pratt Fall.

When Sal Frelick homers they should have one big giant ice cream cone and everyone in attendance gets a free lick.

Chandler Simpson is too attractive to have to catch a ball. What if it hits his face. This game is fucked.

Rays got Podsedniked

What if, instead of trying to hit home runs in every at-bat, we just sent literally every single runner, every single time?

Rice is playing FAU? Are they calling it the Superb Owl?

Florida also used AI (Arch's interceptions) to win that game.

Wish they'd fill the time between the LCS and the World Series with more baseball. The Dodgers could be 0-7 since the NLDS by now.

I love any post built this well to age poorly.

If you are traveling to St. Pete for the World Series, I highly recommend stopping by Floridarama. It’s an interactive exhibit by local artists and it’s only a five-minute drive from the Trop. Kid-friendly and indoors. Closed Tuesdays and Wednesdays, tho.

It's cool that a team who has never won the World Series is going to win their first. It's even cooler that it won't be the Mariners.

It is, ultimately, good for baseball to have heroes and villains. To have teams like the Yankees, Astros, and Dodgers that people love to hate. But man is it nice to just be able to watch an ALCS between two perfectly pleasant teams who will then play a perfectly pleasant team in the World Series.

Another Aaron Boone masterclass. I hope he manages the Yankees forever.

Jalen Hurts is a complete sentence.

"My car can do a kick flip" is the most divorced-guy sentence the English language can come up with.

Can't wait to see thirty of these piled up in Big Tujunga Canyon after the GVBC inexplicably decides to take them through the Shadies at 80 mph.

Dodgers president has announced they are visiting the White House anyway, because they just like everybody in there so much

I was hanging out with some friends at a concert, so I wasn't able to check in on the NLCS but I did want to say hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Ironically, Kyle Tucker and Edwin Diaz have been two of the Dodgers' most reliable players in the postseason.

Fuck ya’all. I’ve got an opinion and I don’t give a flying fuck if you like it. So sit down, shut your ass up, and take what I’ve gotta say cuz I’m not sorry if it triggers you. (*six minutes, twenty seven seconds later*) I’ve turned off comments and quote tweets on this post because of the trolls

Seeing Astros fans post that "The energy in Dodger Stadium evaporated" video like their own players weren't just talking about how lame the atmosphere was at Daikin Park.

No one will make this argument, but it is the correct one. You should pay your off the field personnel more and treat that part like a real business trying to retain and grow talent in a positive environment