Hurb Cherpley

I remember where I was on 9/11. I was getting my dick sucked in a parking lot instead of going to my job on the 92nd floor of the North Tower. Don't tell my wife. She thinks I'm dead.

Sucks to suck! Enjoy prison, bitch

me: mom, what was I like as a little girl? my mom (completely fucking braindead): hey alexa describe a human kid or something

Ah, fuck, I’m going to jail too.

Fuck, dude, imagine hating your kids like this.

I hope Josh Turok loses

This man is spiritually Dutch.

We’re at the point now where if you’re the GM of a contender and you trade for James Harden, you should be fired on the spot.

I like comedy, and I like sci-fi, so people are always recommending funny sci-fi books to me, and I don't think there has been a good one since, like, Snow Crash.

They never say Mike Rogers’ middle name because it’s “Adolfhitler.”

I’m sure he has some bullshit excuse about how this tweet squares with Matthew 25:40, and I’m not particularly interested in hearing it.

There are a bunch of ticky-tack laws that just exist to enforce norms, but traffic laws are one of the few areas that address actual dangerous behavior. Opposing automated traffic enforcement is just straight-up sociopathy.

They're floating in piss

Hour-long video of Dr. Steve Brule just saying “Shai Gilgeous-Alexander” over and over

Maybe, but also Mass Effect 3's ending was some real dogshit:

I guess it's possible that Cyberpunk 2077 will be the last AAA game I ever play.

The Bioware shutdown is obviously the result of their failure at creating a marquee property in the greatest and most unique genre in gaming: the live-service hero shooter.

I would fuckin' love to see Musk die by a sword.

Well, I don't plan on going to Hell, so I'm not gonna run into those guys.

Edward G. Robinson in the Old West sounds ludicrous. Count me in.

oh for sure man

A terra cotta 1983 Toyota Celica Supra would fix me.

The only Elon Musk hearings I'm interested in is hearing his neck break after a short drop.

Frank's Red Hot is a Z-tier hot sauce. Get that shit out of my face.

Hell yes

Most people hate their jobs, so definitely keep up with this messaging.

The thing about MAGA is that they love eating shit. Pay more for gas? They love it. Pay more for beef? Thank you sir, may i have another. Just the most pathetic groveling worms on earth.

All of the personal property of every one of these freaks should be expropriated.

“Receiving a lump-sum payment of the equivalent 1% of your entire lifetime income wouldn’t change your life” is basically a wonkier “It's one banana, Michael. What could it cost? $10?”

SMH, the Dodgers destroying baseball again.

It should be a crime to put Blake Snell on TV, not just because he’s a fuckin’ chore to watch, but also because he’s fugly.

I'm pretty sure my oldest made me watch Preston Pranks the other day. I have tinnitus now.

Cool, a podcast hosted by two people who got completely pantsed by billionaires.

Having a rooting interest in Willson Contreras means that I can also get hype when his brother knocks the shit out of the ball.