Jason Kamphaugh

Speed Limits in the US: Ok, everyone. Let's pretty please try to keep it in the neighborhood of this number. Ok? Thanks so much! Speed Limits in the Scottish Highlands: Colin McRae once successfully navigated this stretch of road at that speed. God be with you!

“First of all, he’s got my face as his profile picture, so that right there gave me a high degree of confidence, because I know what I look like.” — Kash Patel

Kiss Cam Operator Not Going To Stop Until All 32,000 Fans Have Kissed

the famous line about how michael caine treated the muppets as fellow actors and tim curry treated himself as a fellow muppet keeps running through my head we have a lot of brilliant actors, but how many of them can really pull off 'unhinged muppet' the way curry could? what a tremendous loss

At Hy-Vee & I have questions: *Why are there so many middle aged men here who are wearing bandanas? *Is this some new trend that no one's told me about? *Do *I* need to get a bandana? *What kind of bandana should I get? *If I choose the wrong bandana, will I ignite a gang war?

As the doctor left the room, he said to me "Don't drink and don't smoke." Sir, I am in my 5th decade of life. If those aren't my vices by now, odds are they never will be.

The problem, as always, is the muffin tins.

When journalists asked me "where we will see the effects of DOGE on outcomes?" one of my responses was "during crises...as long as media connect the dots." Well, dots connected: www.wired.com/story/cdc-cy...

If one of these archeologists start talking about how precious one of the rings is, we should be very concerned.

Could we please get @hwinkler4real.bsky.social playing Burgum on SNL?

"Not ALL the single ladies" - Nuancé

@realrayporter.bsky.social Hello, Mr. Porter. Currently listening to your reading of @scottsigler.bsky.social 's Voidstrike. Excellent (or more appropriately "maaaaaagnificent") work as always. I've enjoyed every narration I've heard you do. Thanks for sharing your talent with us!

YOU’RE LISTENING TO SISYPHUS FM, THE HOME OF NON-STOP ROCK

@bobcratchitt.bsky.social Hello! What's your take on the team news, both the trophy and the team moving away from Martin?

This is strangely both an Onion story and not an "Onion story". 1. Onion story - story about the Onion 2. "Onion story" - short hand to indicate that a story has to be a parody

For the people in the back! EVERY SPORTING EVENT IS BETTER WHEN CALLED BY KEVIN HARLAN!

was once New Amsterdam.

People need to be more willing to look at a thing, internally say "Well, that's not for me", and just move on with their lives without further comment.

I’m just going to tell the story. Back in 2000 I was volunteering for the Gore campaign when he came along with Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Alfre Woodard and Dule Hill to a GOTV event here in MN. He ended up sitting down across from me stuffing his envelopes.

Unanticipated benefit of being empty nesters: being able to wrap Christmas gifts on the dining room table instead of sitting on the bedroom floor.

Last night, my daughter asked if I would do a mock grad school interview with her to help her prepare. Couple of things: 1. I'm happy to help her out and applaud her drive to be as prepared as she possibly can. 2. I'm trying to figure out what my interview persona will be. Anyone have suggestions?

You've heard of the Engineering Triangle where there's quality, time, and cost and you get to pick two. I've found that my brain has a similar thing with the members of the band The Police. It can retain two of their names at any given time, but not all three.

Sometimes, I'm not sure if the football players are celebrating a good play or wanting me to steal second.

Just realized it's already new season day in the UK! Up the Blues!

I wish there was a button for "Interested but not for the reasons you think I'd be interested."

Dear Amazon, If you're going to put out a commercial claiming to celebrate a small business based in Grand Forks, ND, maybe in the background of the outdoor shot you shouldn't have *MOUNTAINS*.

We just got a letter from our healthcare company denying coverage for my wife's recent 48 hours in the hospital because they have decided that it was "not medically necessary." She was in the hospital giving birth.

"So good to see everyone here at church on a beautiful Sunday morning. Special welcome to all of the moms on this Mother's Day. To start our time of worship this morning, we're going to kick it off by singing 'Mother' by Danzig. Two, three, four!"

A hill I’ll keep dying on: Whatever your politics, the fact that so many U.S. leaders do not understand basic constitutional law—or willfully distort it—reflects extremely poorly on our country.

@bobcratchitt.bsky.social Playoffs! Like Cory says, "A chip, a chair, and a chance."

I used to work for Wells Fargo. Yes it sucked. But one take away I tell everyone is to thank the caller, hang up, and immediately call your bank. If anyone calls from a bank do this. It is the only way to be sure. And don't call the number that called you. Call your official bank customer service.

While running errands with my wife and listening to "Baby Got Back," as you do, I had the realization that since Mix has a 900 telephone number, people have to pay to call him. That's an absolutely genius move. Well done, Sir Mix-a-Lot. Well done.

I think more people, especially in or near my demographic, need to become much more comfortable with being able to observe a thing (movie/music/art/television) and quietly acknowledge "well, that's not for me" and then move on with life.

It's so strange to get a public notification from my kids' school about registering for classes next year and not have to remind any children about getting their classes for next year figured out.

JUST IN: Jimmy Butler has been suspended seven games for conduct detrimental to the team "over the course of the season and particularly the last several weeks," the Heat announced. Miami added that they will listen to trade offers for Butler.

That was the most aggressive haircut I've ever received.

People with homes are so rarely cold at night that I just don’t think homes are necessary anymore.

I put the over/under at 2 years. www.espn.com/college-foot...

How concerned should I be that I've had an influx of followers that I don't know? Anyway, welcome aboard people who definitely aren't bots!

My son was just on national television. 🤯

"Why do they need a science fiction writer at the hospital?" "Look, if they NEED a science fiction writer at the hospital, then shit has gotten REALLY weird, I must depart" (leaves Thanksgiving in a hurry)