Mel Smith

France invades the UK and occupies Kent and Sussex. France and the US come up with a plan, excluding the UK, that enables France to keep Kent and Sussex. F*ck off.

To BBC News Trump is "changing the shape of Presidential power" To normal people, he's abusing his position to pursue personal grievances on an industrial scale to the exclusion of everything else.

First, it was Canada. Now it's Australia. There is hope out there. It's a g'day.

If Starmer wanted to avoid the ire of The Mail, he should have kept the relationship going, got another woman pregnant, paid for her an abortion and left his original girlfriend when she developed cancer.

A bloke who has driven a coach and horses through every single one of the Ten Commandments opines...

Vance has made a pitch for Greenland reports BBC News. It's a threat of annexation, not a friggin' episode of The Apprentice.

Pardons for people who attack police officers. Deportation for people who attack cars.

Trump doesn't want educated citizens. Or healthy ones. Or informed ones. Or empathetic ones. Trump wants obedient ones.

The post from John Cleese is spot on. Trump surrounds himself with people who are polite and deferential, on his payroll or whose lifestyle depends on him. Little wonder he believes everyone likes him. For many of us, he's an utterly loathsome individual.

Baby boomers, like me, didn't have material trinkets but we had hope, a free education, secure employment and affordable housing. Generation Z have none of these, little wonder they suffer from anxiety and depression.

It's official: The lunatics are now running the asylum.

Dear BBC and Sky, the incident in the Oval Office wasn't a row, it was a pile on led by two overprivilged bullies.

Two Clacton constituents with housing issues scour the local newspaper for details of their MP's surgeries. No success so far.

If you were in a plane about to face severe turbulence, would you give the controls to the most boorish, drunk, loud mouthed stupid bloke in business class? Of course not, and when the plane crashes give him another go 8 years later? We live in bizarre times.

There's a documentary on PBS about foreign Ambassadors in 1930s Germany raising fears about the rise of Hitler. Fast forward 90 years and Peter Mandelson is on TV acting as a Trump apologist.

“Be clear about what Trump and Musk’s aid axe will do: people will face terror and starve, many will die” Gordon Brown www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

We are in the midst of an administrative coup the like of which we have never seen - or even imagined - in our lifetimes. Every day brings new abuses, new scandals, which can’t just be undone or fixed. We are in a very dark place as a country and as a constitutional republic right now.

Well done, America. You voted for this shit show. Sadly, those of us in the rest of world didn't have a choice in the matter.

Brexiters are hardly likely to admit Brexit has been a disaster. The sort of people who would rather spend their holiday in Wolverhampton than admit they took the wrong turning on the M6 on their way to the Lake District.

There is no such thing as Trumpism. It's just a collection of grievances by a deeply flawed human being cheered on by other deeply flawed human beings.

KemiKaze’s best PMQs so far leaves Starmer entirely unruffled | John Crace

So that’s the Mirror & Murdoch down, only the Mail to go. And people still wonder why UK newspapers are so vile to Prince Harry & Meghan…

Farage insisting that he has an inside track to Trump while also not getting invited to the swearing in is bang on brand. As, sadly, is the fact that his dishonesty & humiliation will be ignored by much of the media.

What the Democrats need to understand, just like all parties that describe themselves as progressive, is that Queensbury Rules don't apply when the opposition have knuckle dusters.

Officer Brian Sicknick was killed on J6 because of Trump — here’s what Brian’s father said ⬇️⬇️⬇️ "Trump makes sure he gets his face out there. The guy’s a criminal. He’s the reason my son is dead—because of the riot at the Capitol…There’s nothing good about that man."

One tip to help survive the next four years. Focus on what Trump DOES not what he SAYS. There is a huge gulf between the two.

It's been quite something to watch supposedly 'patriotic' British newspapers actively cheerleading on a foreign administration that is openly working against our interests.

Anyone who admires Donald Trump is a twat. One of very few rules with no exceptions.

Is there a more crass, more self obsessed or more empathy free individual on the planet?

Every single day Trump reveals at least one reason why he's not fit for office and should be in prison. Every single day journalists and news organisations give him a free pass.

There are 1000s of trained journalists out there struggling to earn a crust from their writing. It must boil their blood to know someone is getting a huge salary from writing shite like this.

Anyone else feel like the world is being run by Batman villains.

The Daily Mail has never been pro-British- it has always been pro-fascist. The Daily Mail is owned by the 4th Viscount Rothermere, passed on from 3rd, 2nd & 1st Viscounts. It’s been a tool of hereditary power & privilege undermining our democracy. Musk & Trump excite them to take their mask off.

The Trump philosophy, which is shared by the Tories, is easy to understand. Trash all the social ties that bind us together and accumulate as much wealth as possible. The rest of us are losers and merit nothing.

I'm a confirmed Americanofile. From Top Cat, Bilko, Bruce Springsteen, Simpsons, Seinfeld etc etc my love for many US things is deep. So I say this with profound sadness. What the hell have you done by re-electing Trump?

Imagine if 2 weeks before the inauguration in 2021, a top donor to Biden, who he had appointed to a top position in his administration, had gone on Twitter & said to a member of the public ‘f u retard’. Imagine the media response - and the pressure on Biden. Just imagine.

Badenoch shamelessly dancing to Musk's tune is a huge mistake. It's a sign of weakness not strength. She'll regret it.

One thing I find interesting about the echo chamber complaint is that an echo chamber just won a presidential election. Put aside the convo of whether it’s “good” or “bad” for a moment. The far right has devoted enormous resources + time to building echo chambers & loathes spaces they don’t control

He’ll forever be guilty.

Tory MPs must be the only people who look around the country and conclude the two groups having the toughest time are millionaire landowners and private schools. ##pmqs

The Top 3 Tory priorities 1. Multimillionaire landowners 2. Private Schools 3. Rachel Reeves' CV Fingers on the pulse.

For those too young to remember John Prescott imagine Angela Rayner except she's male/overweight plus Starmer and Reeves are really good at politics but hate each other + she has to stop them fighting all the time.

Jeremy Clarkson, who owes his fame & fortune in large part to the BBC, sneers at the brilliant @vicderbyshire.bsky.social for being ‘classic BBC’ when she uses *his own words* to describe his position.

Please spare a thought for James Dyson, the Brexit-voting billionaire who bought up 33,000 acres of farmland to avoid tax then moved his business to Singapore. He's the real victim here.

If you bring central London to a halt in order to campaign against catastrophic climate change then you're a "barmy" eco "fanatic" who deserves to be locked up. If you do the same to hang on to your multimillion pound inheritance tax exemption then you're a brave freedom fighter defying the odds

Jeremy Clarkson is turning up to the protest tomorrow. A reminder that he bought his 312-acre farm in 2012 for £4.25million in HIS OWN WORDS so that he: *would not be required pay death duties on the land*

A word on the Allison Pearson free speech row, and what she describes as a ‘Kafkaesque’ threat to it. We asked her on @thenewsagents.bsky.social to discuss. She said: ‘No. And if you get any aspect of the story wrong my lawyers will be watching.’ Gotta love a free speech warrior 🤷🏻‍♂️

Doesn't need Bletchley Park to decode that the individual is her. Truss is nuttier than squirrel shit.