Rich

Pants per acre type approach

Don’t sleep on this offer? I will take whatever sleep I can get, regardless of offer.

We’ve all been there

Do not carry a cold beverage in their presence. Politely decline any drinks or sweetmeats they may offer. Keep a plain iron nail in your left trouser pocket and a sachet or paper twist of coarse salt in your right shoe. Enter and leave your chair moving clockwise. Follow up with a thank-you note.

Fellow Russ enjoyers. It’s another opportunity to revisit the memories you wish you didn’t have.

Guys we need to all do our part to prevent monks from hiking. Remember, only you can prevent forest friars.

Less shots fired, more military barrage of Berlin

EU Supergirl. This is finally your time

I would probably just take someone else’s car if this was inconvenient. I wonder if the devs have considered that.

EU4. You either die a hero, or live long enough to commit war crimes.

If you missed the solar eclipse, this is what it looked like:

@paperghost.bsky.social in 2019

EXT: Day. The grave of Noel Edmonds. A figure lies face down in the freshly dug soil, sobbing inconsolably. CAPTION: GREYFRIARS BLOBBY.

This whole Joshua bone hill has just reminded me of Neil Hamilton bringing dank memes to ukip

Out at Alton Towers having time of my life with my entire body, which is just out of frame.

We exist in a world where Grant Shapps is seen as a better choice. A for whom the least of his crimes is when he claimed to have read the withdrawal agreement while having ten separate cups of coffee doing so.

If climate change isn’t real, then explain why I’ve had to put shorts on again.

No it fucking didn’t

When WWF (World Wildlife Fund) won their trademark case against WWF (World Wrestling Federation), they slightly altered the panda on their logo to look a bit more smug

@roguepenguin.bsky.social are you a pigeon?

As I’ve just been reminded about civ 1, I have also remembered the actors making up the high council in civ 2. An fmv fever dream

Big news everyone. I’ve just found out that I’m a Polish socialist

Engage me in debate good sir. I have marvellous considerations to make in yonder marketplace of ideas

Someone is extreme happy about England scoring. I think I can hear them from a mile away

When will this heat end? People can see my knees

he's not even a real bin

Derek Guy has finally come for me. It was a good run while it lasted.

So that dinner you were putting off making only needed 20-30 minutes prep. Part 317 in an ongoing series

I’ll just have a little dig around this bramble to see why it keeps coming back. Oh no. Oh no no no. The roots are too deep. Burn it. Burn it with fire.

Issuing a heatwave warning. Please make sure you, family, and pets are hydrated and have shelter.

I’ve changed back from shorts to Jeans. Summer is officially over.

Backrooms 2: My neckrooms, my backrooms

Without even involving AI, I’ve seen a scenario where a guy who was minding his own business, doing one specific thing for maybe 10-20 years or so took voluntary redundancy. Guess who returned a year ish later as a contractor because no one else had been doing that one specific thing.

In my “I want to buy fancy plates from Spode” time of life

Are you truly gaming if you’re not building a spreadsheet at the same time?

a horse walks into a bar and says to the barman, "on a right angled triangle with sides x, y and z, if x and z are perpendicular which side is opposite the right angle?", and the barman says "y, the long face"

This is true in the same way I used to say that one of my cats existed on a spiritual level we couldn’t comprehend.

We would like to increase your home insurance by 22%, unless you make the vaguest suggestion of leaving, at which point we will reduce the increase to 0%

We didn’t know that Geocities was the peak. Everything was so new, how could we have known? Also, play hypnospace outlaw for a view of sorts on how things used to be.

I’m sad to announce that, after the police deployed facial recognition technology at yesterday’s Unite The Kingdom march, my thumb has been arrested.

Just finished a speedrun on a game about organising a magical library. Unsure if this is good or bad tbh