Ryan Schofield

"We Can't Eat Road Salt" should be a whole ad.

Really glad I got off the possible rapist train at the possible Nazi stop. :)

So nobody funny came to BlueSky yet?

The guy just makes up laws with a sharpie. Has been literally raping and killing people for decades. Hasn’t bothered to adhere to a single norm, convention or tradition. Has disgraced the office dozens of times daily. And he can’t read but you gotta give him a library. Everyone gets one USA! USA!

This guy would be 38 but you all didn’t trust the black lady.

Guess we better give em up.

Wait did the sound person crank out the solo to Free Bird just when The US won? Whatever they’re being paid is not enough.

How do hockey fans do this? I am about to puke Strawberry matcha everywhere and I only decided to care about this three hours ago.

If you voted to deport murderers and rapists, if you voted to deport the worst criminals - the way they promised. It’s still ok to say you didn’t vote for murdering nurses, stealing children, and tear gassing teachers. It CAN be both. We can even DO both, and have. It’s okay to find your line.

This is a joke he thought was funny enough to use so often he had to say “once again” this time. Man, spelling Teevee like that too. El oh el

And How many people lost their jobs bc they made a Charlie Kirk joke…

I don’t have anything for Ryan - are you sure you ordered for drive thru at THIS McDonald’s? Can you find the code…

They don’t give major league jobs to minor league coaches who spend 3 year failing with a whole Manning.

Not today RFK.

Hey @dknetwork.bsky.social Maybe the widget where I’ll track the over in real time on my phone’s Lock Screen isn’t the place to wonder if I have a gambling problem.

Thanks to the fiscally responsible Republican Party for the billions out of the budget we’ll have to pay to cover countless lawsuits from this administration.

And to be clear, collateral for what?? 2 arrested “gang members”? I have horrible news for everyone. Being in a gang is not illegal. If the charges are illegal entry or even drugs the means are absurd when compared to the ends.

Boxing is always wild but I’m fairly certain I just saw Mr Beast, a Saudi Prince and Dana White sitting together.

man they really didn't give a shit about that guy. as soon as it was clear they couldn't use his death to launch a purge they started to treat it like a nothingburger

We all just saw a Google commercial? That said "if you're asking for an address in your phone, shouldn't the first one to answer be your phone" Fuck no. No it should not.

Our full episode, btw, is a full-length doc about how two Democratic politicians from Harvard are behind a $2.3B scheme centered around climate change. They had a key donor: the richest owner in sports. They hired Drake, Leo DiCaprio, Robert Downey Jr... And, secretly... youtu.be/1OwzYk6OCFM?...

Incredible show!! #oasis #oasis25

Trump doesn’t have a 90% approval rating among his kids.

We Just watched @patmcafeeshow.bsky.social jump the shark in real time.

OJ Verdict. During freshman English class at my Catholic high school for some insane reason.

College sports version of fanatics, only worse bc they’re only making their money off the back of unpaid labor (who they could very easily compensate through NIL). Then they rope in your favorite podcasters so you’ll think they’re cool & good instead of soulless partners of the NCAA. Cool hat tho.

So. I fine tune my preferences by (and this may be crazy) Following the people I want to and not following anyone else. If any app would make a following timeline. That held my place and only showed me the people I follow that would be great.

GOP Lawmakers Watch Silently As Trump Strangles Each Of Their Loved Ones In Turn theonion.com/gop-law...

Being a Dad with a dead Dad on Father’s Day is like throwing yourself a birthday banger every year on your dead Father’s birthday.

What do you mean turning the army into shot girls for Dana White’s energy drink isn’t what you voted for?

This entire tweet doesn’t mention Jim Harbaugh. But there’s a picture of the black guy who’ll serve Jim’s punishment for him.

Would be amazing if true. But it’s not. It’s based on a 5 year old study involving 40(!!) people total. Keep it movin.

The body has to still BE IN THE TRUNK.

Bad times when even Teslaa stock is better than yours.

"We weren't really gonna take him. Lol" - the whole NFL apparently.

Sanders is going to he Mel’s best available for 48 straight hours.

Shout out to God, indeed.

🏈 Draft Day is finally here, and we've put together a starter pack to help you follow the action. Check it out, and share some of your own favorite accounts in the comments!

The only thing he’s ruled out is shutting up.

May I have your attention:

Does he think he gets the Tariffs?

Everyone watching the Pitt has the Mouse Rat song from Parks and Rec in their head the whole time right? @kentremendous.bsky.social

Hands off!!

That’s the first time anyone has said a BYU kids “stroke looks good”.

Somebody go to Australia and tell Stugotz Coach Cal is making coffin jokes after beating Pitino’s vampiristic ass. @lebatardshow.bsky.social @jessicasmetana.bsky.social @mikeryanruiz.bsky.social @jeremytache.bsky.social

Meet Evan Anzoo, a five-year-old boy in South Sudan who died when Elon Musk shut down USAID and the boy lost access to his HIV meds. Musk says no one has died because of the aid shutdown, but that's because he didn't look. RIP, Evan, you deserved better. www.nytimes.com/interactive/...

Bars.

A lot of you are dumb motherfuckers, and you voted for a guy who, if you knew him, would be the dumbest motherfucker you knew.

This The only white person publicly admitting a recent mistake in judgment that was displayed live on tv last night? Nobody else huh…? Nothing else comes to mind?

Whatever. No sympathy. Everybody who voted for Trump voted for somebody to get hurt. Everybody who voted for him knew he’d do awful things to some people. They just didn’t think they’d be the “some people.”