Simon scarfe

8 minutes?! Someone’s been on the crack again. #ncfc

I do love a kvistgaarden leaping header. #ncfc

“Missed” the first 30 minutes, but looks like I got home just in time #ncfc

Woof. What did that ball do to Paris? #ncfc

What’s frustrating about us being so flat is just how beatable Southampton seem. Neither team look great. #ncfc

Does my Speak-n-Spell feel pain when I type O-U-C-H? The jury is out. Philosophers and neuroscientists say that's fucking stupid, but I called a guy from the Center for Pretending that Household Electronics Are Sentient and he said there's no way to know for sure.

Gah - it’s another 730 start. Looks like I’ll miss the first half once again. #ncfc

Jovon Back-ama bitches #ncfc

Really hot take here, but I think this game has goals in it #ncfc

Checked prime to find the movie actually on there. Have to admit, am slightly disappointed. #filmsky #letterboxd

Foot like a traction engine #ncfc

Two years ago, this Burnley team went up with one of the best defensive records of all time. Wtf happened? #ncfc

Really like what brooks gives us. Can see why Sheff U fans were upset they let him go. #ncfc

Hahaha, what was that defender doing? #ncfc

Might actually get to an away match this season after all. Pity it will be like all of the other drubbings I’ve seen at that vacuous shithole of a stadium. (Yeah, “vacuous”, i know what I wrote) #ncfc

Woof, this is a really tough watch. #ncfc

I always suspected a UK government would eventually reverse course on "coding in public". So I've been backing up all government code. For six years. Today I finally generated a report on what has been deleted. Its much worse than I realised. github.com/uk-gov-mirro...

I am all for saving Jodrell Bank, but please don’t lose sight of the fact that it is simply the most visible manifestation of a much bigger problem, which isn’t solved if someone magically finds the money to keep it going, simply to shut people up. 🔭🧪

Truly the battle of who couldn’t care less. Turns out it’s France.

Yup, there’s that feeling back. Hope followed by a brutal dose of reality.

Colombia v Switzerland being referred to as Charlie v The Chocolate Factory.

Band name idea - The Load-Bearing Substrates

For once happy for my insomnia. No chance I was falling back sleep through that.

Decided to watch it in the morning when delay came in. Woke up at around the first hydration break though. We’ll see how it goes, doesn’t feel likely that the game will send me back to sleep.

Highlight of this game for me was when my partner asked if DRC players drank Um Bongo in the hydration break. I love that woman.

My intention to do a beer race and make the England game tonight is entirely in the air. 5 pints in and doing the calculus to figure out if it’s at all achievable. Either way, beer race was fun.

I’ve seen zero blowback on the Emma hayes half time segment last night (I enjoyed it). I only know about it because of others’ editorialising about it. Am I living in a bubble? Absolutely But it’s entirely by design at this point and I have no desire for that to change.

I do like the refcam. Makes me wish everything was filmed like the smack my bitch up video.

Tuchel says #England are playing a “high pressing team style like a premier league team”. Unfortunately, that premier league team is Tottenham.

Welcome to the Blue Suede shoes help line. Dial: 1 for the money 2 for the show 3 to get ready 4 to hear the options again

I’m a terrible person, but after that whole “if we lose, we’re suing” thing, I’m kinda hoping boro win to keep the drama trickling along. I guess this is why people watch eastenders.

Remember sneaking into this when I was 15 (just picked the only 18-rated film starting at that time). I don’t know what I expected, but it definitely wasn’t that. Absolute treat.

My entire feed is Norwich fans waxing lyrical about emi buendia, and they’re all very correct.

Only just catching up on the EFL/Spygate news. Sounds like the correct decision, if only for that Harwood-Bellis celebration. Hope he gets memed to eternity off the back of it.

One of the Swansea fellas sure falls over a lot. Franco Spencer. #ncfc