Chris

We tried "everyone is entitled to an opinion" for three straight decades and all we have to show for it is four thousand cases of measles and a death cult running the government. It's time for people who don't know what they're talking about to shut the fuck up.

I thought that “PHP programmer who thinks that vulnerabilities are the discoverer’s fault” was an archetype of guy that died out in 2010. This is like rediscovering the coelacanth

This is Ed Zitron to me

I wish someone would give me a six-figure speaking gig to teach them how to build something stupid and expensive which (by my own admission!) doesn’t work

the tech industry, the fossil fuel industry, and the agriculture industry have so effectively neutered the legislative process that the very idea of, say, a tech privacy bill is psychologically DOA for most Americans.

the datacenter debate feels a little bit like someone claiming that if we just banned private jets, the climate would come around. like, do I hate private jets, or do I hate the guys who own them? the latter, obviously. but just taxing all those guys wouldn't fix this larger, nuanced problem

this might be the worst one yet

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Credit monitoring is a useful service if you’ve ever been worried that someone is going to pay off your credit cards without your permission

I am going to be a massive humorless asshole about woo-woo shit, no matter how seemingly harmless, for the rest of my life due to this. astrology, homeopathic medicine, etc etc it's all bullshit and it's not fucking harmless. there are people who will die due to this who would have otherwise lived.

You can learn a lot from video games. For instance, Pokopia has taught me that I need to spend more time walking up to my friends, telling them how much they mean to me, and then handing them some crap I found lying on the ground

my dermatologist just prescribed me Skyrizi which sort of feels like meeting a celebrity

I’m not a particularly good driver but no mistake I’ve made has had people angrier at me than simply driving the speed limit

people playing music/videos on their phone speakers in public is more than just mildly annoying and is instead a leading indicator of the decline of community and empath

I’m the guy who designed the trucks in Death Stranding. It was my idea not to add roofs even though the rain is incredibly dangerous and the world is full of bandits with guns. I am paid millions of likes a year for my innovations

Look, YNAB is a great app and I don’t know how I would manage my finances without it, but going to a fan convention for a budgeting app is completely deranged

It’s cool to call a body of water “the drink”

YES, I love driving my gigantic pristine truck that I’m too small to climb into comfortably. NO, I will NOT be learning to park it. If you have a problem with that you can KISS MY ASS!

I’ve been thinking about how easy it would be to build a favstar-like service for this website and debating whether it would be stupid in a funny way or just stupid

My manager somehow sent me an Amazon gift card in Saudi Riyal. Neither of us are Saudi and everyone else on the team got USD or EUR. We’re completely baffled by how this could have happened.

These are hands down the most dogshit apps on my phone

Customer: ITS MY KIDS INITIALS DMV: FUCK YOU Verdict: DENIED

A thing this implicitly sort of gets at is that a LOT of AI hype and bullshit AI products is entirely down to investors who know nothing about the actual technology loudly demanding that every tech company make visibily AI-focused products, whether those products make sense or not

honestly, whatever. you were all warned!

There's this wild Lovecraftian horror to a grown adult talking about how great it'll be when AI can make full-length movies and books based on a few prompts, because you suddenly realize they've only ever seen shadows dancing on the cave wall for their whole life. Nothing has meant anything to them.

Scientists love saying this sort of shit to sound smart. My man that’s what color is. You are describing color.

imagine how jealous your friends would be if you rolled up to the court with this bad boy

man there's going to be a whole 5 year generation of tech with useless AI features built in that we'll just have to ignore for the next 10-15 like 3d tvs

You don’t see a lot of frankincense or myrrh these days

Schitt’s Creek is a show with a simple premise: “What if Arrested Development wasn’t funny?”

The Bluesky app I’ve been working on in my free time is almost usable for casual browsing now