SquidKid

(Mormonly) i'll have a dirty soda, please. and a disgusting cookie. can i get that with the depraved frosting? how much to add the filthy little slut toppings

You can lead a stupid horse to water but you can't make it think

at the carniceria and they have a whole DJ booth out front for chili season and it's literally shaking my car windows lmao

Some friends are teaching their baby ASL as an early bridge to speech and they made the mistake of teaching her “want” as a concept. Now she wanders around the house signing “want” all the time as an expression of unfocused desire. They fucked up and made the baby invent the opposite of Buddhism.

Getting rid of ALARA is actually fucking crazy

Melot Kiros won, lfg

Facing severe staffing shortages and equipment issues, the National Park Service has quietly dismantled its underwater recovery team at America's highest-fatality recreation area.

They Will Kill You is so fun it's unreal 😍

An American just got sentenced to 30 years in federal prison for moving “Antifa” zines and there’s about 1000x as much media coverage of Trump’s reflecting pool 👍

I have been doing a lot of critical reevaluation of Roman and medieval historians recently because I am living through the kind of end to an autocratic regime that very sober, serious modern historians have footnoted with phrases like "an unreliable account from a hostile chronicler."

I went from reading a few books a year to around one a week. I wanted to write down how I got there, how it involved rethinking my relationship to attention, and why I believe reading books can heal your brain. I hope this gives you something useful! johnpaulbrammer.substack.com/p/how-i-lear...

grabbing every small business owner I can find by the shoulders and yelling directly into their faces that IF I DON'T HAVE AN INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT I CAN'T SEE ANY OF YOUR SHIT GET A FUCKING WEBSITE

Hit the pen and looked at Google maps and started crying because it's probably the most complete map of the world we've ever had and I think that it's beautiful that you can put your little family restaurant on it

made a stirfry tonight that was so good I know I'll never be able to replicate it and my husband will ask for it incessantly

hit a blinker before my potluck and the first person that I talked to turned out to be the damn mayor

Got a notification from a medieval copyright lawyer

I took this pic a few weeks ago and didn't realize how perfectly Americana it is

The controversial weed killer Roundup is now being deployed in private and public forests at record rates. We go inside the secret plan that helped make it possible.

the ugly expensive running shoes are, unfortunately, all they're cracked up to be

Worked at my job for 7 years and it's only just now occurred to me I could look up reviews of the place Anyways I am absolutely going to continue to not look at that shit are you crazy

Happy 20 years of Neil banging out the tunes 🐀🎶🎉

✊ No workers. No food. In Colorado, 3800 marginalized workers are taking on the world’s biggest meat company #JBS. Fighting for safety, dignity & fair pay. “This strike is a matter of life and death.” When workers organise, power shifts. 📖 grocerynerd.substack.com/p/grocery-up...

just watched my dog steal half a granola bar from my purse before turning around and then burying said granola bar back in the same purse

what a great day to not work with Stryker machines

My gym is so busy on weeknights that often the only cardio machine left open is the rowing machine. So I picked up rowing out of necessity. And holy shit it's all I think about now. I yearn the erg. Best sport for chronic disassociators.

neolithic guys get pissed if you tell them their cultures are organized by the type of pots and jewelry they made. "we called ourselves the blood hunters" "we conquered villages far beyond this horizon" sorry bud you're the western linear pottery culture now

Chekhov's jetski

my office flooded this morning which sounds bad but there's now a wildfire across the street so we might be doing some real Buddhist parable stuff here

If you’re still in line, STAY IN LINE

owning a home is so cool because sometimes you wake up only to find your water heater has shit its pants

damn he got grassy-knolled

Refusing to engage with the name “Mingus Reedus.” You can’t make me know about that

Deal or No Deal holds up extremely well if anyone was wondering

Really cool this is happening while a tsunami is racing towards us in real time

Doing therapy (eating black raspberries out of my garden and listening to the neighborhood kids play)