「LUCKYSTAR ACTUAL」

BOY WOULD WE LIKE TO

the nature of the human race is that we are bound to endlessly reinvent homestuck

Ruin a song by adding “In My Pants” to the title “Tell Slater Not to Wash His Dick In My Pants”

walking up to some kid and screaming six-seven with the exact tone and cadence of the spongebob chocolate guy

if you learn you have an indirect connection to a vore enjoyer through your polycule does that make them a metamorsel

I never felt bad being the weird kid with an old Sega Saturn because despite being a doomed console, the Saturn had Panzer Dragoon and NiGHTS, two of the greatest video games ever made. Even Mario couldn't compare to Moebius-inspired sci-fi and a genderfluid dream jester.

man remember when you could see stars at night

putting on my best Hank Hill-ass voice to ask "is this song by that Machine Girl Kelly fella?" just to watch this twink suffer

EXCLUSIVE: Rep. Delia Ramirez is bringing a bill to eliminate DHS a day after the raid on Rep. Ilhan Omar’s home.

gender therapy is bullshit just take HRT and see how you feel in like 3-5 weeks

head so good it makes you forget you have opposable thumbs

gouda edam queso paneer meaux brie, you are a pirate

Caine barging in to say today's adventure is a gender reveal party, and everybody needs to guess if it'll be a Zangle or a Gooble

being a technical woman in a patriarchal society poisoned by sycophant machines owns guys will just call you to defer the task of reading their emails, but also expect your explanation to align with their asinine gut assumption as to what the email meant, and get hostile if it doesn't. very cool.

LLM dudes whining about prompt injection is so funny. "Yeah, I've got a coworker so compliant he heard 'go pound sand' and dropped everything to go find the nearest beach to punch. Dave found him 12 hours later bloody and dehydrated. Anyway we told him to search online for weight loss tips..."

I know that the reason we don't use "babe" the way we use dude is because it feels sexist, but the solution isn't to not use babe, but to instead sexualize dude.

need a french enby to hurry up and invent the third loadbearing sandwich in the Croque Monsieur/Madame category

lookin at Reverb got me thinking I should call her...

me as hell fr

polycule consisting exclusively of situationships call that a ménage à tr[Home Improvement noise]

repost if you aren't an emotionally undeveloped coward who can't handle a few kobold fantasies

People liking my old tweets

all I need to escape samsara is a low-to-medium gain distortion pedal with high headroom that can comfortably slot between a clean overdrive and a rockerverb, but unfortunately nobody knows what that pedal is so I'll be here for A While

need an all caked-up femmes The Sword cover band purely to sing How Heavy This Ass

male stripper named Charles Entertainment Cheeks

FBI handler sweating bullets trying to figure out if this makes you hireable (beastiality) or unhireable (woke)

a cock in a cage is worth two with full bush

getting cancelled for my sustainable ethically-sourced carbon-neutral data center after sources reveal our power comes from a series of unsuspecting joggers getting trapped on a road-sized treadmill

even now there is hope for man, but it's said with a soft upward inflection and a sarcastic sidelong glance at the viewer

watching the most grossly negligent food contamination event of my life: "a new clam touches the bacon"

womb tattoo of two fists with knuckle tattoos that say WOMB TATS

evangelion: 5.5 you can(not) boy mode

I fix all my problems by taking radiation-type damage

explaining a color palette to trans women: imagine a 5 day bruise paired with warm faded rope ligatures and some bright bite mark accents