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It's that time of year when we have to tell people to not hold lit fireworks.

Every year, people are betrayed by their optimism. "Fireworks have exploded in other people's hands, but surely they will not explode in mine. My hands are different."

Friend, to a firework, your hands are the same. To a firework, your hands are bones and gelatin to be ripped through with incredible ease. Don't hold that lit firework, friend. Lite it safely and follow the manufacturer's instructions. That's how you have a safe and happy 4th.

Here's our official fireworks press release with data, more safety tips, and no references to 'The Rock' (1996): cpsc.gov/Newsroom/New...

But The Rock is where I learned that holding pyrotechnics is fun and cool! 🙃

This is a tremendous disrespect to 'The Rock' (1996) as Stanley Goodspeed was holding VX nerve gas. What kind of safety officers are you?

Are you sure? Roland Emmerich seemed pretty confident it was a virus in the DVD commentary.

I mean, entirely possible that the science is... questionable, but from SG himself: "It's a cholinesterase inhibitor. Stops the brain from sending nerve messages down the spinal cord within thirty seconds. ... A twinge at the small of your back as the poison seizes your nervous system..."

Either Nic Cage looks Sean Connery in the eye or Stanley Goodspeed looks John Mason in the eye. You can’t mix and match