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LMFAO had to check the poster of this headline. You got me, Onion 🤣

I was rescued from the grueling Pilotos data mine in the hills of Cuba by a group of missionaries, then shipped to Florida to work at an Amazon warehouse at a very young age

children yearn for the data mines🤣

Big O Talks are so much better than TedTalks

I dream of a time when I'm a grizzled data prospector, roaming the harsh land with nothing but a mule, a shovel and a musket to search for a lucrative data mine that will make me rich. Ah, the dreams of an old prospector ...

Could)

lol theonion.com/report-we-do...

Clever delivery! Well done

It's good for the economy!

Omg could it!???

U guys gon bid again?

A down side? Surely this is a win win. Here's your trophy 🏆 take it!

Interesting points I'm sure but what's her @ ?

I thought this was supposed to be satire

Well, she made much ado about nothing by saying equally as much...

I thought you guys were satirical, that is just an actual article a different news source would make.

When you consider the upside, it's worth it....

bruh

That poor digital canary

Nah just ease up on it, only mine them 70%

Considering what I do... this is just so funny to me. Once again, the Onion FTW.

are you sure this isn't a NYT headline?

Unlikely

The headline just seems like a template for all NYT articles

NAAHHHH

You could have told me this was some VP at Meta and I would have totally believed it.

I thought someone had linked a Federalist article.

Now I know I’m worth something! But don’t get any of the benefits. Just as prophet Leon Skum foretold.

Doesn’t matter anymore unless you can make a lot of people believe it?

If you aren’t paying for a product, you’re the product.

Satirical vs serious. I swear, over the last 5yrs+ the lines differing the two have started to blur.