Degenerate Geometry

My southern, gen z, lesbian, dark souls streamer didn't know who Dale from King of the Hill was

The Cheesecake. When you're here, you're Factory.

A jury of my peers? TWELVE murderers?!

he had lips made for taco bell, and the ass to match. he had the digestive tract of a quarter horse. in like a lion, out like a lamb—he had a mouth built for burger king and an ass for wendys. he had the teeth for arbys and the tongue for long john silvers. if his throat was destined for culvers, th

With all the videogame companies being ruined by private equity and monopolostic corporations maybe instead of making "controllers" they should make someone a "comptroller" so they could comptrol where the money goes

Peeing with a weiner is like in those old cartoons when the firefighters turn on the hose and it zips all around spraying everything and people are screaming; there is a fire

NPR says a kilometer is the same thing as a (mile)

That movie wasn't very good. The one we saw.

Spiders are so fucked up looking. Fucking 1/10. God let his fucked up lil nephew design those nasties

I only have longcomings, actually

So @badbisque.bsky.social just saw a dog walking towards the Petsmart and said the dogs for adoption were gonna bark. They barked and then she said "I'm a dog genius!"

Pronouncing "poise" as "pussy" loudly at the store

Having poison ivy salad as an appetizer. It's made from scratch.

Do you think Mr Peanut’s shell protects him from CTE or do you think we could give it to him

Sung lasses

Me: lol look kids The Blowjob Burger has something called vacuum sauce on it My 9 year old son Zelensky: vacuums dont blow tbey suck dad Me: go wait in the car Zelensky

Im a treadmillionaire. I have one treadmill.

youtube is a website where scandinavians teach you various skills

Yeah, people talk, but there are times when our age gap comes in handy :) like crosswords! I do all the clues about current music, and he does all the ones about what you used to be able to call the Irish

Crap crap crapping in heaven's bowl

Reading the Rosetta Stone: hmmm

Couch blanket fart particles are locked in with no chance of parole.

The first step in safety is knowledge

Me, loving my wife: I love my wife. Other people i see "loving" their wives: I hate my wife.

This is not necessary. It is 2026. I have personally seen a monkey eat a log of shit like a snickers and I am not even around monkeys that often. Maybe grand total: 28 minutes when adding 42 years of zoo visits

The Wheel of Time books are the ones to read if you want to hear about the "greasy taint" without reading chuck tingle

Im going to a comedy show at 9:15 pm? On a school day? 9:15 is when my eyelids usually start trending downwards

All you had to do was like the gift

Since I barely know how to read and do not know how the different letters make DIFFERENT sounds I have been under the impression the Balatro was created by Gwyneth Palatrow with an extra hump under the P and no w

If we as academics or health workers aren’t going to speak out now, then when, exactly? What are we waiting for? How can we be neutral at this moment? And we cannot forget that federal health leaders, including physicians, are complicit in this horror; must we be "civil" about that? Fuck no.

I was kindly invited to give the final plenary at this year's American Society of Bioethics & Humanities annual meeting—I discussed being a global health professor who engages in advocacy One thing I got asked is: should scientists or healthcare professionals remain politically neutral?

Ever since I cleaned the cat pee the room has been smelling a lot less cat pee-y

Welcome to Peanut Butter Corner, the podcast about peanut butters I've tried. In today's PBC we're discussing Trader Joe's Organic Creamy Peanut Butter No Salt Valencia. One of the wettest peanuts butter. Definitely fridge this bad boy. This is a mellow one, not very roasty. That's it. Peanutty

A guy with a secret family but the guy is a kid that stays at your house a little too long

I have no clue where my mom finds the blurriest gifs of all time to send to me

holy smokes, conan strikes up a chat with a random lady on the subway and she immediately starts riffing on his level, no problem.

Magellan haters be like (in a weird voice): Sir Cum, navigate the globe

For every single law there are 23 loopholes created by the rich and their lawyers to circumvent that law. Im proposing just one loophole for them to exploit and it's at the end of a rope

"lmao why dont americans protest like the french!?" Well we do, and by we i mean mostly non-white people, yall just calll them rioters and looters when they do it, and the police also brutalize them, beat them, shoot them in the face with rubber bullets and crack open their skulls on the pavement!

The hole is the window of the butt

Watched 3 eps of The Walking Dead and saw 3 different people perform a Rock Bottom finisher on 3 different people