Gatsby that is Average

Butker might be an absolute dogshit kicker but at least his personal beliefs are also dogshit.

Sad news for cinephiles: Tilly Norwood has been killed in a Ukrainian drone strike.

Brad Pitt appears to an elderly Jar Jar Binks in the hospital and tells him “Ebberyting ganna besa okeyday” in perfect Gunganese

The paramount app is straight fucking dogshit, but im sure that piece of shit cunt Ellison will make it better now that the government is allowing him to consolidate media.

Gameday socks

Started my day by getting a tire fixed and ending my day at a political fundraiser... is this what hell is?

Me helping my kid do homework

Posting kids outside of businesses to shill things people dont want or need is a form of terrorism.

My wife hosted her book club this evening. Im occasionally eavesdropping and I dont think they've talked about any books but they have talked about: Diarrhea Nathan Fielder Perimenopause Swining Pools Zoloft Injections Scheming how to get one of their significant others to propose Costco

Fuck the Broncos

It really annoys me how often commentators are called announcers.

Should I feel bad for absolutely hating a fellow 3 year old in my kids daycare class. The kid fucking sucks on many levels.

What percentage of people who watch Ted Lasso have any idea where Ft Scott is?

doug eddings can go to hell, first for the obvious reasons, but secondly (and almost more importantly) making me take the same side as the cardinals

Introduce yourself with 10 acts or bands you've seen live. Huey Lewis Weird Al Metallica Slayer Deftones Black Sabbath Neutral Milk Hotel Modest Mouse System of a Down Tenacious D

#HEYHEYHEYHEY

Hey Royals

Fun Fact: Brian Moorman student taught my high school government class as he was an education major & went to college in my home town. He had neat stories about almost getting drafted & trying out for multiple teams. Then one day he was like "I have a tryout with the Bills" and he never came back.

Its gonna be kind of hilarious if the Royals go 18-11 the rest of the way. Which I guess isn't far fetched.

Is that a lot?

#HEYHEYHEYHEY

ACAB

Forgetting a line in the national anthem is like missing a button when dressing. Some people wont notice but some people will masturbate to it.

My 3 year old is obsessed with spiderman... he may never forgive me if he ever finds out I read him bedtime stories, rocked him to sleep, laid him and bed, then immediately left to go see the new flick in the theater.

I cant think of anything that would make me less want to go to a @royals.com game than fucking Toby Mac.

I can't breathe the air, I can't eat lettuce, I can't afford gas, and my kids have measles. But at least now our soldiers will have enough testosterone.

Clifford Jameson

This is such a hilarious take on Schumer. The dude has done absolutely nothing to help democrats.

CEO Reveals How He Used AI To Build One-Person Company That's $1.3 Billion In Debt

this, forever

After much thought, because my Fandom of the beautiful game really took hold in Europe... it only makes sense for me to root for Mexico, because fuck England.

Fill your garage with Hogwater.

If I was a more petty person Id sue to have "protect and serve" removed from police cars.

I genuinely hate how Paraguay plays. Every player should get a yellow card for flopping like a bunch of fucking bitches.

Democrats

Its staggering how many assholes dont understand the difference between lying and being wrong.

Hell Yeah Brother #usmnt

#AmericaFuckYeah

Olives