Ian Gary

what if Canada just declared this America's flag, and started using it on their literature and websites

Important info re: ICE’s new evil power gloves.

I’m tired, boss.

Help! My symbolism! It's so overt! And very explicit!

Whoever’s running the simulation just took their Econ 101 class.

I wonder if it was the exploding or the collapsing or the not working or the looking like shit?

First they came for the men who sucked the blood out of their sons penises, and I did nothing...

Brother you have got to be kidding me with these Dems.

It also comes with this awesome black mirror face. Nice last thing to see as I struggle to fight its nimble fingers off my throat.

There will be many historical assessments of the Republicans in the not too distant future. The consensus will be “Yeah I dunno man. They were just a bunch of light-speed stupid motherfuckers I don’t know what to tell you.”

“Hopped up on surgery”

they're gonna do another J6 because someone suggested they don't get struck by lightning

Never once has this man made me regret my Weird Alcoholism. A national treasure.

The world is run by all the losers from school. The flat out dorks. The guys with no game. The dumbest jocks. And now, the guys who couldn’t handle their drugs. FFS dude, build a tolerance before you go on a conference call like this.

Everything else has been awesome. But this brought a tear to my eye.

In awe of this attempted spelling of “aficionado”

What’s so amazing is, this is @newyorkstateag.bsky.social Letitia James. Someone right in the crosshairs of Trump BECAUSE Democrats are so do nothing and weak. Money and status make people insane. I like steak frites too hon, but damn, something’s gotta give.

ahhhhhhahahahahaa

Nobody is ever allowed to talk about rugged individualism ever again.

I am a beneficiary of the @funkelly.bsky.social bump industrial complex. #DoinNumbers

Guys who can’t even tie a tie run the world.

the softness of golden hour

Impressive.

HOOT MAN!

The White House is now beefing with the weather

George Bush literally said "Mission Accomplished". It's one of the most famous photos in history. What?

Here's my concern. Everybody always talks about what they'll do when it happens and how they'll celebrate; but where's the infrastructure? Who's prepping the bozo packs? The bottles of piss to get airdropped? This is going to happen and we're all gonna be caught flatfooted.

There’s all sorts of dangerous misinformation online. Like when people try and tell you that “sump pump” is short for “sumptuous pumptuous.” That’s probably not even true. It might be though.

Mariska doing a matinee and a 7 pm performance of her one-woman Broadway show and then watching the greatest comeback in Finals history actually looks like the Jordan flu game

We laugh at the dummies of yesteryear, but if I lived in the Middle Ages I would 100% think God was mad and bludgeon the person next to me.

Sadly, the last of these can only be found on every dating profile I've seen for the last 6 years.

“Welcome To the Jungle”, a song about debauchery, and once considered edgy, can now be heard playing at the grocery store. A soundtrack accompanying my purchase of stool softener. What is time.

Props to CNN’s chyron writer:

Brother, what in the living fuck?

“Wow i love this bread.” “Thanks, my Mummy made it!” Please clap www.cbsnews.com/news/oetzi-t...

I always joke that we turned on the hadron collider and went into a alternate timeline… But I’m also not joking

I like dirty talk

I gotta be honest. This is the least bothered I’ve been by anything he’s ever done.

I am crying

🤍🤍🤍

Black people are giving it these Confederates raw and uncut. This is how it’s gonna be now. You wonder what we’re thinking? It’s this. I believe this is activist Gary Chambers again in Louisiana.

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