JesseJace

My man looks like Tilda Swinton ate Tilda Swinton

C U R S E D

Tomorrow: flea market. Mood: anticipation. Age: elderly.

Over-under on a Tommy Tallarico mention in his acceptance speech?

There ya go

I took a six-month break from shooting B-roll for my next train line tier list video. (I WAS BUSY, OKAY?) Today I got a few stations' worth, putting the end of that step in sight. Script writing will take a while, but I've started planning it.

Today is Friday in Japan shoot

This dummy vs. Cash Me Outside vs. Hawk Tuah tables ladders and chairs match when

Are there LinkedIn trolls? Like, can I just go on there and blow up people who I know are in Japan without a legitimate visa?

Guys, new Smash JT just dropped and he's Buddhist

I'm other words, balance has been restored.

I'm getting drunk on the shinkansen on my way home from a business trip, listening to The Dollop, and I have tomorrow off. You wish you were me right now.

My man looks like Rick Astley's less-famous, less-likeable kid brother

My mother-in-law is more lucid than this and we worry about her enough to monitor her remotely via an elderly monitoring camera

HE'S DUMB AS SHIT

Musk is over here impersonating the stoned guy who didn't pass the first year of theory and changed his major from Music to English.

I haven't heard you denounce the Brotherhood of Hecate, sir

Hear that, Zelenskyy? THEY'LL ALL BE IN THE SAME LOCATION

French people can do some shit that'll turn you white, mon frere

"Elvis is in Nutty Buddies," he said, illustrating his point by grinding a pair of Nutty Buddies into his forehead with both hands.

Street Fighter was fun. Some of the songs were anachronistic but they complemented the action well and at least it was better than most of the SF6 soundtrack

I worked at a gas station for half a shift. It felt unsafe and the smell gave me a headache. I tried to keep the uniform but they hassled me so I reluctantly have it back.

Life-size Chocobo at Arche in Omiya today

You know, one of those many "oops I drive through a roadblock and now I'm on an unfinished highway because I'm a goddamn idiot" situations

You can sing "freeze the pope" to the tune of "Please Don't Go" by Double You

She will be a colloidal suspension

if i take a walk in my little walkable neighborhood to buy fresh flowers and crunchy nectarines and my serenity is punctured by the sound of your tesla flipping in the air, i will blow up your car with a rocket launcher

I would have loved to play Seymour as a younger man (or voice Twoie now, for that matter...I reckon I could pull it off). She should have got it. This is devastating. Fucking philistines.

It's about time. Get that Johnny Gat novelty head-looking piece of shit

They can't even get up to go to the bathroom, and you want them to VOTE?

Mid-November, "Musk" will be available for rent on Apple/Amazon etc. In January it will be on HBO.

We need to make Stephen Miller's nightmares come true. Jot that down as a platform plank.

LOL what

Right back atcha, Palmer Luckey, who will one day be super dead

Who brags about being an undesirable jackass? Me. That's who.

THIS EVERY DAY ✊

Tommy Tallarico was on this show more than once

My man looks like a flesh-tone Volkswagen with its doors open

Normally I don't get excited about winter approaching, but it just occurred to me that this holiday season might bring us all new videos of ICE agents eating shit, breaking their tailbones and shooting their own nuts off.

I hope that comes to Japan because I would fuck with that

Tell me your politics suck without saying those words

Holy shit

Israel: Never forget October 7th. Me: TOO LATE, ASSHOLES