pope "pope crunch" crunch

Historical precedent for all the “girls that poop vs. bitches that shit” memes

My son was suspended from school for giving another student a "pigjob" and now we're all sitting around the empty dinner table as a family with our palms flat on the surface staring at nothing in particular in silence. It is understood none of us will ever ask what the word means.

If conjoined twins got bitten by a werewolf they’d become a we’rewolf...and send

Wastewater treatment fact: If you flush a dollar bill down the toilet, we'll find it, bleach it and use it to buy Doritos from the vending machine

John Brown's raid on Harper's Ferry began on October 16, 1859.

There’s this thing people do where they’re surprised that a rapper has read a book or knows any music theory or something else “intelligent”. Anyway, I hate it. Thank you.

growing up before the internet was just buckwild. all the permission slips and general structures were based around 'whose problem is this kid' instead of 'who is protecting this kid' like this isn't difficult to believe in the slightest. absolutely nobody gave a shit and it ruled

New working paper: the Norwegian wealth tax was a huge success. The "exodus" of wealthy people never happened (less than 100 individuals left). Tax revenue increased by 71.5%. No changes in business activity or investment. www.nber.org/papers/w35854

hey so do you guys think jar jar's nuts hang as low as his ears do or like

Look at them (please)

Bluesky is like a classroom. And the mods are like the teacher! We are like classmates, some of us are friends now and maybe some of us will be friends later. And like school students, we're all growing up and learning. And that's why, to me, Bluesky is a lot like a classroom! Thanks for listening.

Drink the water outta your toilet, you George Costanza looking motherfucker

This could also be I love jackin off Flickin my bean Until the sauce comes out Yeah For my boys with pussies. I see you and i love you.

To the tune of i love rock and roll by joan jett I love jackin off Haulin my yam Till the sauce comes out Yeah

the good news with these indignities is that the more you experience them the more you are disabused of the notion that there is something wrong with you. you understand: they simply do what they like, all the time

*shoots a trans person in broad daylight* You shouldn't hurt the machine god's feelings like that.

*wading through a sea of corpses* siri has feelings you know

people who constantly exalt in the pain of other human beings, monetizing their cruelty and bathing in gold accented ivory tubs filled with the blood of the innocent: hey man you shouldn't say that to the chatbot

fuck

Having long been aware of those tech bros who read my work as utopian porn, where they’ve taken that doesn’t exactly surprise me.

👨‍🦱💬🗨👨

Xal'atath💜 #worldofwarcraft

woah cool

This bitch eating speggy

and other people's rights are not yours to give away as a bargaining chip. fuck all y'all.

❌ AI generated slop menus with pictures that make your food look like worms ✅ scribbles on a piece of paper saying how much the soup cost

People say the worst thing someone did shouldn’t define them. That’s probably true. But the worst things they did to me still define me. There’s no justice, restorative or otherwise. I am still left knowing that I was violated. That he tried to kill me. That my whole family still loves him.

“This doesn’t actually have anything to do with me” is such a powerful anti-posting mental device. Discourse I could jump in on? This doesn’t actually have anything to do with me. Other posters beefing? This doesn’t actually have anything to do with me. An internet personality exposed? Guess what

I don't know how people find these random old posts, but sometimes they find a winner. Yesterday someone liked this 2+ year old image and it let me see it again. Look at baby Colin Robinson.

“You are infringing on the time and brainpower of people by pushing "your" content that little/no of your brainpower went into” is such a banger

who knows if jackson can win this thing but i am glad that he is making clear that susan collins's whole scam is to do everything she can to make life worse for mainers and then take credit for mitigating it in the slightest way possible

0.08 milligrams of fluoride per litre of drinking water protects against cavities by remineralizing enamel on our teeth. some of the fluoride finds its way to our bones, the rest coats our teeth via our saliva. fluoride occurs naturally in soil, air, and in some water (yes, naturally), which is

I know you all hate Instagram but the Alaska Sealife Center has an orphan baby walrus 🥹