Reba

@papapishu.bsky.social are you doing anything cursed for Halloween this year or are you retired

slightly sleep deprived seeing the backpack i use every day in the corner and thinking “that’s my friend”

HASAN: People say that you were, by a freak accident of metaphysics, born completely unsouled and unable to relate to or feel empathy for others. YGLESIAS: Yeah 🤠

Giving these idiot machines the ability to send humans emails should be a capital crime

NEWS ANCHOR: The shocking attacks are committed by roving gangs of reported "mutants" from "somewhere deep below". Their desire is to rend and eat flesh. The only known way to kill— WOMAN: (clicking off TV) Oh enough of all that. Let's have uninterrupted sex near the window, with my top off!

There comes a time in every reactionary politician's life when he must steel himself, insert a nasogastric tube for unclear reasons, put on his bravest grimace, and give the weirdest thumbs-up anyone has ever seen.

[lying] I was cool

ME READING THE NEWS: these pigs are out of control. ACAB ME WATCHING DUI BODYCAM VIDEOS: the boys in blue need to tase this loudmouth bitch

I stopped checking social media and posting all the time, and you know what? You guessed it. My life didn't get better at all.

If I don’t text you back immediately I will respond within a couple hours. if i text “brb” you will hear from me in 3-7 business days

A decade+ of refusing to learn anything about “Ethan Klein” continues to pay dividends

Pro-ICE conservative blogger Samuel Sey, a prominent figure on the evangelical right, has himself been arrested and held for potential ICE deportation.

"The Rhetoric From The Left"

Everyone already piling on this, but I want to point out you can always tell what’s going on when the tone is one of entitlement+resentment instead of deep legitimately confused grief. When they talk about how they paid the bills instead of how much they loved and nurtured the child. Every time!

if by chance any of my followers are voters in district 22 in new hampshire, vote for my friend greg in november for state representative. he is endorsed by leon

maybe 15 years ago, white people were suddenly like "omg have YOU had SRIRACHA? it's SOO good. it's SOOO good on EVERYTHING" and then a few years ago, they did the same thing with Lao Gan Ma Spicy Chili Crisp. well. here's the thing. they were right both times. sometimes they're just right about em

elementary schools teach long division six different ways, giving equal time to all six. Only one way actually produces a precise and correct answer of course. And it’s so FUCKING stupid. Christ!!! Oops I forgot to tell a joke

thinking about how simple it would have been to be a child living in a quiet farmhouse way back when. mother mends a garment while father teaches my younger brother Caleb his letters. i am reading the only book in the house — the family Bible — and i am so bored i am going to fucking die

I emailed this to another device so I could record myself playing it

Earthquake did 500000000000 damage to my hut.

dream journal: primo lifeguard job i was just about to get was taken by unqualified Italian Stavvy-looking woman named Fatia Mafia

obviously not a great situation re Ilhan Omar but I did for three seconds think I was somehow getting a text from rarebodyoils

Just got tipped off to Sally Daley, a Chicago church organist who released a dozen tapes of… low-fi sacred ambient??? in the 1980s. This shit is CHOICE. www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqb7...

he is absolutely a sketch comic lol. Gilly and Keeves, *the sketch show he is a co-creator of,* is incredibly funny. he also consistently crushes every pretape. live sketches obviously uhh not always his forte

????

asking this right before they bring the dessert menu

In anticipation of a future I pray will never come, I've written the following. Yes, even in tragedy, there is hope... mine is that this poem will heal the wounds that divide us. It is called "Elegy; or, The Fall".

‘Deadwood—Now That’s A Great Show,’ Says Dad After 17-Minute Lapse In Conversation https://theonion.com/deadwood-now-thats-a-great-show-says-dad-after-17-minute-lapse-in-conversation/

buried alive in a makeshift grave by some proper Glasto lads for once 😂

assumed there was something wrong with my Patreon app but came here to check and

It Only Monday

the “tv is too high” people are wrong! High tv kicks ass!! Haha! Yes! Fuck yes!!

a milestone for me: when "horny but socialist-ly" type Lana Del Raytheon got busted a) trying to cash in on their follower count to pressure a young woman into sex and b) nonbinar-ily setting up group DMs for women to "safely share nudes," then changed their avatar to a black circle in contrition

the 32nd and 33rd worst things about Herzog and Singal are 32). they exclusively use AI slop art for illustrations + 33) Singal is one of the all time nastiest uggos. barf

Bride & Groom’s Signature Cocktails Laura: Aperol Spritz Scott: The stuff from the beginning of Prometheus

action therapist trailer 1-4

bus stop I use occasionally has repeating loud beep every second 24/7 to direct the sight-impaired to a big button that, when pressed, does absokutely nothing

A world where a twist ending is repurposed as a video title. where a thing's climax has been removed, leaving an advertisment for the gap where it used to be. such things are commonplace in. the twilight zone