The Forlorn Gamer

Airbnb went from a cheap way to crash in a spare bedroom or rent a vacation house for a weekend and turned into "what if hotels openly hated you and acted like they were doing you a favor by letting you give them hundreds of dollars to stay there, and also it's more expensive"

Somebody should buy me Sonic Adventure 2 for the Sega Dreamcast, an inexplicably expensive game.

I swear I didn’t know that McKenna was the last person on earth to not know the major FFVII spoiler or else I wouldn’t have deployed a tactical Wario strike like that.

i think the games industry should have studios that exist

I would be able to explain my favorite comedy sketch in a way that Elizabeth Holmes would understand. It would be easy for me.

the video game industry was a 40 year long sociological experiment conducted by Harvard University. the study is now complete. thank you for your time

Sonic Adventure for the Dreamcast is the perfection of the Rashomon story.

Guy who only refers her to as "Mank's Amanda Seyfried"

I think Sega Rally Championship for the Saturn should be in the same replayability conversations as Tetris or Super Mario 64. All I’ve been able to think about for days is whittling down my times. I can see myself regularly playing this for the rest of my life.

Me in college the first time I listened to My Foolish Heart:

Pavement/Guided By Voices, Jesus And Mary Chain/Mazzy Star, Dinosaur Jr.

RIP to this angel

Disavowing the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. Those pants shouldn't have fit all those girls

Now is the time to care about everyone, not “once we win” The time to care about everyone is always always always now

boardwalk a.m., cape may, new jersey, 1978

chuck hates muslim people as much as donald trump does, maybe more

el-sayed is one of the only guys in this shit ass country that doesnt suck

Have had my Sega Saturn Saroo for almost a week now. Have spent at least an hour with each of these games. The line of delineation is around #16, everything up to and including Sega Ages whips complete ass. Cannot get over how much I love the Saturn.

Resident Evil is a better name than Biohazard but Dracula X is a better name than Castlevania.

Model: Mecha-Shiva Debut: The Venture Bros. Year: 2003 Designers: the artists at Needle Soup Productions, Inc.

The reason why I’m siding with Kelly Clarkson on this situation: she was my first celebrity crush when I was nine. Simple as. She’s America’s Idol.

the part during the Beach Boys show where John Stamos makes miscellaneous uncs shoot poison on stage

the male reading thing is way simpler than most people make it. men typically don't like reading books about women whereas the opposite isn't true because women typically see men as subjects and men typically see women as objects

They named an animal after the fact it eats ants. That's fucked up man

Baby monkeys after being introduced to cloth mother:

“hey”

*Spielberg in the alternate universe where the Criterion Closet is the complete N64 library, holding up a copy of Army Men: Sarge’s Heroes* You know, Sarge was my main inspiration for Saving Private Ryan. (Pause) the stories he tells, you never truly realize the scope of what happened over in Europe

Anyway to my bluesky faithful I’ve become terminally Segapill’d this last summer, having gone from never having owned or really extensively played a Sega console to owning both a Dreamcast and a Saturn. I’ve developed Late Onset Sonic Autism and am having the time of my life.

I think by all rights it’s time to make the jump from Twitter to here. The juice is just increasingly becoming not worth the squeeze. Plus all the Twitter accounts I love from 2014 are here now.

i got so many people calling this tweet fakeposting back when i made it but since this is bluesky and things have less reach on here im just going to post the photo

Letterman: Tonight we’ve got the star of a new movie that’s sure to be a hit… that’s right, it’s the shovel from “Digger” Paul: ha HA!

Today, I decided to dump all my thoughts about A.I. infecting the retro and Saturn scene into one cohesive article. In short, I am certifiably sick of this.

In which I discuss exactly what Sega Does that NintenDoesn’t

tilly norwood vs fred flintstone made up: ✅ / ✅ has a job: ❌ / ✅ catchphrase: ❌ / ✅ pet dinosaur: ❌ / ✅ is a virgin: ✅ / ❌

I have heard WWE is the storytelling company and the entrances company but I think we can put that to bed now