👻A Filthy Phantom👻 (AKA Smands)

Had some thoughts on OFMD cat alignment 🐈🐈‍⬛

Sí, ella podía. Y lo hizo. RIP

I miss this show often.

If you're my friend and you're reading this, esp my OFMD pals, please know that I miss you so much and I'm sorry life has been such a drag lately. 💌

Chat with my health insurance's AI assistant. AI directs me to unhelpful page 3 times. Request chat with human. Human puts me on hold for "not more than 5 minutes." Health insurance co. auto logs me off within the 5 minutes.

Me when tall people complain a pair of pants is too short online

Wait HE CHANGED THE SPELLING *TO* SEAN BEAN?? 🤣

[greg davies voice]

We are not going to get out of the fascism problem by accepting just enough fascism to turn the heads of the fascism-curious.

Just heard Rhys Darby say he was out of work for several months, what a crime. I think he should get a show like Undercover Boss but it’s Undercover Rhys, where he has to come to work w/us and pretend he knows what he’s doing while he helps us with the daily grind. I think it he’d try his hardest! 😂

Cleaning out the garage and found a box of ancient relics! Feel free to tag yourself. 😂

We’re so cooked. 🫠

This is a picture of two women from the Vernon Cadet Training Centre, which holds summer programming for 12-18 year olds to develop skills on the way to adulthood. Unlike Secretary Hegseth, they do not deserve contempt or ridicule.

Name five albums that helped shape you: 1) When the Pawn - Fiona Apple 2) Grace - Jeff Buckley 3) Wilson Phillips - Wilson Phillips 4) XO - Elliott Smith 5) the record - boygenius

It is unconscionable that Dolly Parton should die before So Many Other People 🤨😭

not to be confused with quesadilla

I turned to my spouse after the foot touch and said, “I’m gonna get REAL weird about this.”

I’m always worried my kids will need to make a diorama for school, but the one time they did, the school gave them a box! I just feel like I made a lot more dioramas, but also we didn’t have powerpoint back then.

Hear me out, like a 2000s water bra but with helium I refill every day to try and crane lift these behemoths 😩

Have just discovered that Palantir CEO is Taika Waititi’s Wario

Directing Graham Platner’s campaign

Every website when I’ve clicked “Remember this device” and try to log in again

[person who has never seen soccer before] “oh no is that guy hurt?”

Whut How much money does it take to give an award. To a book.

Oh my god he says it was DEPRESSION????

Stede, Jim, Pete, and Frenchie.

Can anybody recommend a workout of like all your muscles have atrophied and it hurts to bend and you’re like a sickly Victorian child with a wasting disease? I just need a tiny bit of core strength back at a time.

imagining a grizzled hardboiled detective saying this while gripping some guy's lapels at a shady bar

I love Kid Mayor as much as I will allow myself to love a politician.

Wish I was a member of the Mysterious Leg Bruises Club, but no I am always keenly aware where they came from bc I ran into the fucking table again

The White House didn’t know Swamp Thing is an ally.

It’s a mood ring and we are all ≋S≋T≋R≋E≋S≋S≋E≋D≋

Times are tough, might have to downgrade from LGBTQIA+ to LGBTQIA with ads

Once again, a better metaphor than I could ever think up 😂😂😂

Rad, can’t wait to find out the many ways I will benefit from this technology 🙄

This was the best birthday present ever, TY universe

Hello pocket friends. Saw this and thought of us 😌

Alma gives the left one to Doug

Halloween costume inspo bc I have all of this in my garage right now.