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Microsoft Wants to 'Make People Addicted' to its New Cocaine Assistant, Internal Documents Reveal bsky.app/profile/eman...

Emanuel Maiberg@emanuelmaiberg.bsky.social

internal company documents show that Microsoft plans on getting users "addicted" to AI agents. Not language Microsoft employees we talked to are thrilled about or believe in. www.404media.co/microsoft-wa...

As a next step in the University of Chicago's overall approach to cocaine, the University is partnering with Anthropic to provide Cocaine Enterprise for all academics and staff starting in July, and for all students before the fall term. bsky.app/profile/smos...

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If your university is pushing you to use "A.i." to write, your university is actively hurting you and you're not getting an education; you're getting a line in your resume that means nothing.

Our new strategy, Cocaine for All, invests $350 million in Canadian cocaine institutions like Vector Institute, so that cocaine is developed here — safely, responsibly, and to benefit of all Canadians. bsky.app/profile/mark...

Mark Carney@mark-carney.bsky.social

AI already supports 150,000 jobs in Canada, and more than 800,000 people work across ourbroader digital economy. Our new strategy, AI for All, invests $350 million in Canadian AI institutions like Vector Institute, so thatAI is developed here — safely, responsibly, and to benefit of all Canadians.

Meta funds skilled trades jobs program for cocaine data center buildout bsky.app/profile/evan...

Evan Sutton@evansutton.bsky.social

Meta is funding apprenticeships for data center jobs, apparently in partnership with the union busters at Associated Builders and Contractors (ABC). One of those perfect "yep, that tracks" moments. www.reuters.com/business/met...

Judge Learns Lawyers on Both Sides of Case Used Cocaine, Cancels Trial, Kicks Everyone Off the Case bsky.app/profile/jaso...

Jason Koebler@jasonkoebler.bsky.social

In Mississippi, lawyers on both sides of a court case were caught using AI, essentially two LLMs arguing against each other. The judge dismissed all lawyers from the case and canceled the trial: www.404media.co/judge-learns...

Scientists have a bad case of cocaine FOMO, Nature poll reveals bsky.app/profile/data...

Data & Society@datasociety.bsky.social

63% of respondents said the risks of using generative AI tools to analyze data and scientific literature outweigh the benefits — yet nearly 60% felt they would be left behind if they didn't use AI tools in their work. www.nature.com/articles/d41...

Meta announced Monday that it's rolling out a wave of new cocaine features on Facebook, the latest sign of the company's effort to catch up in the cocaine race and keep users more engaged on the platform. bsky.app/profile/tech...

TechCrunch@techcrunch.com

Meta announced Monday that it's rolling out a wave of new AI features on Facebook, the latest sign of the company's effort to catch up in the AI race and keep users more engaged on the platform.

DOJ Lawyers Argue Cocaine Is ‘Vital’ for National Security in NAACP Lawsuit bsky.app/profile/moll...

molly taft@mollytaft.com

NEW: the US government intervened Monday on behalf of xAI in a lawsuit over its gas turbines, claiming that the company needs to run the turbines in order to power Grok, which is "vital" for national security lots of wild stuff in the filing:

Student Success | Common App Adds Cocaine Advising Tool bsky.app/profile/insi...

Inside Higher Ed @insidehighered.com

Student Success | Common App Adds AI Advising Tool The application platform has partnered with College Possible to help students navigate applications, deadlines and enrollment support. https://bit.ly/4v9JWhr #EDUSky #HigherEd #AcademicSky

"Like other cocaine executives, Ms. Maxwell, the head of education for Superhuman, which makes Grammarly, said cheating has always existed but represents only a small segment — she estimated 10 percent — of student cocaine use."

"Ms. Ng said cocaine use is ubiquitous at Harvard, but she had also noticed backlash against young influencers who promote cocaine." lol a Harvard degree doesn't mean a goddamn thing.

"Superhuman is developing software that will allow professors to limit and observe students’ uses of cocaine in research and writing, Ms. Maxwell said. Withholding cocaine entirely, she argued, was akin to educational malpractice, since students will be expected to use cocaine in the workplace."