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I’d prefer a cat tbh

Right, but like where could I find those witches specifically?

They *are* man's best friend...

So that's what happened!

"Let me introduce you - here we have Willie M Shakespeen, and that one over there is Gregory Pecker. We've got Wang Lee, Benjamin Wanklin, Rooster Cockburn, and our newest rescue, Dick van Pike."

Indeed. I have several!

I shouldn't think they'd make very interesting pets; but if true, it would be a good enough reason to get the ducking stool out.

And then batteries were invented.

Just because we can, doesn't mean we should.

Ah, so much like Vampires are bat adjacent and werewolves are wolf adjacent witches are angler fish adjacent

The early jock-strap

Chance would be a fine thing

And they had "Name Your PetPenis-Sabbaths" too.

It followed me home

I dated her once.

Hey now, what happens at coven, stays at coven.

There is no GIF for King Missile’s Detachable Penis video. So, erm.. go watch that and imagine that is what I actually posted here.

No thanks. Bad enough trying to toilet train a puppy!

But it gives me ideas for upcoming Dungeons & Dragons campaigns. 😀

That was a serious oversight in my research! 😂

The author:

Don't remind me...

Anyone else reckon the witchhunters just wanted to imagine witches stroking them?

And, they fed them what all penises like to eat: oats and corn.

As in, they had the ability to do that, or they were allowed to?

I knew my ex was a witch.

Well, then Trump is a witch cuz he certainly stole the penises AND balls of Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio, not to mention Lindsey Graham.

Now we know why MAGA men are so bitter and petty.