Bette Vile

chuffed with how this came out. oil pastels are my thing now! #art #oilpastels #artsky

If you recognize this don't forget to take your pills today

okay yep, I see what the problem is here. your drive shank is busted to hell. that's gonna cost you a pretty penny to fix, I'll tell ya that for free.

my neighbour is training up a new sheepdog and this is basically how it's going so far

i have decided i hate poetry and poets and possibly words

Here's something you may NOT know about beluga whales: they have squishy foreheads. This area is called the MELON, and it's a specialized organ filled with fat, oil & wax that acts as a deformable acoustic lens, focusing sound waves into the water around them. But wait, there's MORE!

ewe again?

Meat Loaf is training for the Olympics

I got that bog in me (various types of mush suspended in liquid)

'möther, come quick. little timmy* is stuck down the well*'

Coworker: The meatloaf is better today than the first time I got it. Me: Try it tomorrow to find out if two out of three ain’t bad. Coworker: Sometimes I hate sitting next to you.

A wet day, so good to have Boot the runner duckling on duty today

Y'all are very powerful; I got the job (pending successful referencing and a police check)!!! You can uncross your fingers now, thank you so much for your efforts

scenic scratching post

just had an interview for a job I might actually want, so everyone put good vibes out into the universe for me and keep your fingies crossed 🤞

hi I've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty

scenic scratching post

new tingler 'NOT POUNDED BY THE SENTIENT TESLO FLYING CAR BECAUSE IT’S OBVIOUSLY FAKE BUT I’M SURE PEOPLE WHO THINK THE PIRATES AT THEME PARKS ARE REAL AND BIRTHDAY PARTY MAGICIANS ARE ACTUAL WIZARDS ARE PUMPED.' out now here www.amazon.com/dp/B0HNHXRGJ2/ and patreon www.patreon.com/chucktingle/...

Find a hand-written note and post an image of it.

a fun aspect of job hunting is reporting the many ads I've seen for companies paying less than the legal minimum wage, then they don't get taken down and no one responds and nothing happens.

Yall wanna see a reindeer nommin a stick

things that have scared Dwayne The Cat Johnson enough to go into fluffy triangle mode today: - the breeze slightly moved a fallen leaf - Meat Loaf rolled on her back a bit too fast - He rolled on his back a bit too fast - some grass existed - He ran too quick - there was a bug

if spiders wore clothes, do you think they'd make them from their own silk or nah?

Roses are red. Tires are flammable...

she yells at me to take mental health walks if I've been inside too much

Add a photo you took of something good

if you took the number plate off my car, I'd only be able to recognise it by colour and the thriving ecosystem that's grown around it

Please do not thirst follow me. I am a philosopher.

Forget LLMs, what we need are more MMLs

Nation’s Indigenous People Confirm They Don’t Need Special Holiday, Just Large Swaths Of Land Returned Immediately https://theonion.com/nation-s-indigenous-people-confirm-they-don-t-need-spec-1839033177/

yearly reminder to people insisting that we view Christopher Columbus as "a man of his time" that *the people responsible for the Spanish Inquisition* thought Columbus was out of pocket

“Already the chemicals are thought to contaminate the blood of nearly every living person. Research links them to cancer, liver disease, kidney issues, high cholesterol + birth defects.“ This is bad bad, I can‘t separate this environmental destruction from any asshole who defends and uses ai.

Hi, I’m a sighted alt text user! Here are some reasons I use it: - Slow Internet on an airplane - I’m over 40, I have no idea who that celebrity is - Bluesky broke images again - My vision sucks and that text is too small to read otherwise - Conveys further context and authorial intent

ask your doctor if lying down in the forest to be consumed by the earth is right for you

Something I used to do with friends: Nic Cage Roulette 1) go through his IMDB and write on slips of paper every noteworthy film where he plays the lead role 2) toss the movies in a jar 3) select one at random. that's what you're watching.

it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood

I know at least one of you freaks will find this romantic

The American white collar workforce started working from home three days a week for like six months a year into COVID and executives so thoroughly lost their minds over this that they installed Trump II. If anything, AI will create the 7-day workweek.

Man who won’t give his employees piss breaks claims many piss breaks on the horizon