The REAL Markula Colenstein

BREAKING: VIRUS AT FIRST SIGHT, the solo music project of Beloved Internet Weirdo Markula Colenstein, has FINALLY released three EPs that have been stashed away since late 2018: EXILE IN ZANESVILLE NEGATIVE AGE SUMMER OF LOVE These and more now available at markulacolenstein.bandcamp.com

This motherfucker should be tried for treason and fucking executed. So goddamned tired of Zeta-males who think they have somehow earned (or otherwise deserve) the right to control our country.

The Ramaswamy ad has pushed the largest newspaper in Ohio, the Cleveland Plain Dealer, to reverse its position on endorsements. "A candidate who uses childhood sexual abuse as a weapon against the person who endured it has crossed a line that Ohioans should defend, whatever their party."

I really, really hope we can make this pathetic little loser eat shit next Tuesday.

Lula winning is great for the planet, great for Brazil, and great for people who aren't revanchist assholes everywhere in the world, but let's not forget that it's also going to make some of the worst people on Earth extremely sad and mad. We should enjoy that, as a little treat.

I’m not a political journalist, so was gladly surprised at the community I found here last night. To Americans anxious about the upcoming elections, a key thing we learned in Brazil that might help you: DO NOT engage with the far-right online. Don’t share rage bait. Amplify your people. Ignore them.

No, they were middle-aged men wearing powdered wigs, elaborately embroidered hostess jackets, silk hose, and shoes with enormous buckles and substantial heels. In other words, our Constitution was written and signed by drag queens.

The urge to untie the knot of self is surprisingly strong today.

INDICT CONVICT EXECUTE

Vivek Ramaswamy is nothing but a mediocre, greased up, pedophile protecting, healthcare grifting, mini-Trump wannabe -- and I sincerely hope we Ohioans can permanently end the political aspirations of this miserable, disgusting little prick.

Fun fact: If you don't believe in fairy tales, they don't scare you.

Our duty as Ohioans is to flatly reject this disgusting piece of shit by a margin that is impossible to dispute - and my family and I will absolutely be doing our part!

Good morning At least we have this to look forward too

"...I said, 'His ass, shit, it's like a pile of muscle.' Then I looked at his legs and I said, 'Man, his feet are big.' Then I caught his print and I said, 'Wow, I bet his wife is happy - I wonder how good it must feel to suck it?'"

"And then the nurse puts a spoon in the applesauce and brings it up -- and here's what confuses most people -- she says it's an airplane. An airplane! And she tells you to open up the hangar, but what they don't tell you is your mouth is the hangar. But I knew! And I opened my mouth like a big boy!"

Let's get to it, chop chop

Struggling to engage with the concept of “father and son Republican operatives Timmy and Tommy Teepell.” Come on man can even one thing be like 5% less stupid

NVIDIA seems to be channel stuffing, forcing Amazon and other customers to take early delivery. The argument that these things are "scarce" when you don't even have anywhere to plug them into is nonsense...unless NVIDIA is saying you NEED to take them now, or else. GPUs are stacked in warehouses.

Anyone else catch this vibe while watching the first episode of "Crystal Lake" on Peacock?

“The internet is a store but it used to be a library” hits me like a slug to the chest

EXACTLY! There should be a fucking ONSLAUGHT of ads featuring this!

Maybe he'll die?

My man looks like Jack Torrance if he’d been the winter caretaker of a Chuck E. Cheese

As an Ohioan I will of course be voting for Sherrod, but FUCK do I wish we had an Abdul. If you don't understand the difference... I can't explain it.

If only some patriotic, second amendment-loving American would just do the right thing already...

I have grown so weary of the delusional ravings vomited forth by this syphilitic pedophile. The man is absolutely dotarded.

A familiar name. A new race. Former U.S. Senator Sherrod Brown ( D ) is back on Ohio’s Senate ballot. He’ll fight for lower costs, Ohio jobs and affordable health care. The record is there. The choice belongs to Ohio voters. 🗳️Nov. 3rd & be heard💙 #Ohio #SherrodBrown #VivaHerAlliance #SheShed

We can’t allow this man to get within striking distance of a viable presidential candidacy.

When they passed FA and have entered FO.....

It's kind of crazy that the right wanted to turn Charlie Kirk into their Reichstag Fire, but instead they accidentally turned him into their Harambe

And a rapist, and a pedophile, and a racist...

Maybe if the AI people yell at me for the 5 millionth time about how I’m not using their dogshit technology that has made everyone’s lives worse I’ll finally start liking it for no conceivable reason.

Hakeem Jeffries is not up for the job. They have got to get rid of him in January.

I find it so funny when these beta-male nobodies go to such embarrassing lengths in attempting to demonstrate their machismo. Serious low-T energy.

@durbin.senate.gov, as Donald Trump's former personal attorney Todd Blanche is too ethically conflicted to lead DOJ. During his short tenure in the Department, he has already proven himself on the side of corruption - not justice.

stuff like this is why one important avenue for court reform is just nixing the shadow docket altogether and forcing these people to explain themselves to the public when they issue orders. also, making their records property of the united states and subject to publication when they leave the bench.

Because there is no point in attempting to reason directly with the Pedophile-In-Chief, I will address, instead, the multitudinous cells that comprise his body: You guys all seem miserable whenever I see you in public together. It's obvious you all HATE each other. Have you considered divorce?

Any book that is ok with slavery can't tell you anything of value.

How often do we *really* consider the probability that we are simply another stop along an evolutionary path rather than its ultimate terminus? Yes, humans can manipulate affordances like none other, but every preceding stop along the way was also state-of-the-art for its time. So much hubris...

as a committed centrist, it saddens me that both parties are falling captive to their extremes - the right to insurrectionist cultists who want to invade american cities, and the left to socialists who want better bus service

No "Intelligent Designer" would have used the same organ for both excretory and reproductive purposes, nor would it have put the reproductive organs so close to the hole where shit comes out. #facts

A very happy 80th & final birthday to our great President!