Rolo Tomasi

Not The Onion.

US government killing Americans in broad daylight, kidnapping foreign leaders, threatening allied territories and dictating corporate capital returns. But “invest in America.” 🤡

Five years ago today, Donald Trump urged his supporters to attack Congress and the Capitol over a proven lie. More than 140 police officers were injured. Trump then pardoned the attackers. He betrayed his oath and his country, and we won't ever forget it.

Many are saying that was a better speech than the Gettysburg Address.

Trump sounds like a maniac at some sort of demented open mic

Hey ChatGPT: Please generate an image of a man thoroughly devoid of any and all human empathy.

Rep. Yassamin Ansari has set up a table and this sign outside Speaker Johnson’s office.

ESPN slowly removes their ‘ESPN BET’ sports ticker during their segment on the Terry Rozier and Chauncey Billups gambling arrests

A block from the main protest in Arlington Heights, IL. #nokings @quigley.house.gov

AOC: The problem is that the Trump administration, they think that destroying our health care, making sure that housing is too expensive to live in, that jacking up the cost of our groceries—they think all of this is about hurting Democrats. What they are doing is hurting Americans

Kristi Noem, while governor of South Dakota, supplemented her roughly $130,000 salary by secretly accepting $80,000 donated to a political nonprofit she was affiliated with, records show. She never disclosed this income on federal ethics forms. (Published June)

Dr. Jane Goodall filmed an interview with Netflix in March 2025 that she understood would only be released after her death.

De Niro: "I gotta go. A couple cases of Tylenol fell off a truck and now I gotta figure out how to put autism in them."

> @ishaantharoor.bsky.social

Via Phil Robertson, Cartoon by Macleod: The Republican Party. In recognition of Charlie Kirk's commitment to free speech. We are calling for the firing of anyone who criticises [crossed out and replaced with] quotes him.

Silly Jimmy Kimmel. He should have just called for all homeless people to be killed and he’d still have a job.

Whether it’s Republican politicians joking about the murder of Melissa Hortman or Democratic politicians expressing their condolences after the murder of Charlie Kirk, both parties have a extreme rhetoric problem.

🧵 An open letter to the US Open and USTA: Trump will attend the #USOpen as a guest of ROLEX. Yesterday, Trump declared 'WAR' on Chicago. The USTA has called for media censorship of dissent against Trump today. I played NCAA tennis many years ago and still play. Today I resign my #USTA membership.

Statement from Sen. Ossoff on the CDC.

Morgan Wallen Boycotts Grammys In Protest Of Desegregation https://theonion.com/morgan-wallen-boycotts-grammys-in-protest-of-desegregation/

Finally got a chance to watch the @joshjohnsoncomedy.bsky.social routine about Trump and Epstein that came out a few days ago. I am blown away that he managed to put together a full hour of stand-up about breaking news and it's somehow polished and funny as hell. Give it a watch and share it.

Stoked for Jake Tapper’s next five years of reporting on this

"We don’t let them die. We’re calling their names. We’re remembering their sacrifice. We’re honoring their legacies." talkingpointsmemo.com/news/generat...

@msnbc.com reporter at the 1:15 mark. “The chaos you’re seeing is not the result of peaceful protestors, it’s the result of actions of law enforcement, specifically the Los Angeles sheriff’s department.” #nokings

Trump Mouths Lyrics To ‘Happy Birthday’ While National Anthem Plays

Boebert: What we’re seeing in LA is an insurrection Pritzker: You don’t know understand what insurrection is. It is outrageous that you are asking that when you are the one condoning the pardoning of people that attacked police.

Knicks ran 15 different lineups tonight. 7 lineups had not seen the floor together this season before tonight, 8 if you include the unit that had recorded 1 possession.

crossed him off the screen!! Ended up on the other side of 8 Mile

Jalen Brunson got the double "BANG" call from Mike Breen 💥

ICE Agents Wait At Edge Of Delivery Table To Deport Newborn

We simply had to intentionally destroy the world’s strongest economy while dismantling our scientific and educational infrastructure to ensure that a team with a trans girl would never finish second place in the Mountain West volleyball standings again

Breen: "Another power dunk for OG Anunoby. The lead back up to 15" Clyde: "The players are flabbergasted. Like how did he do that?"

#GoldenAgeOfAmerica 🥇

AP: “.. Data published on DOGE’s “Wall of Receipts” shows that more than one-third of the contract cancellations, 794 in all, are expected to yield no savings.” @apnews.com #DOGE 🇺🇸 apnews.com/article/doge...

#TodayInPyongyang

Whether it's Hillary Clinton sharing risotto tips on a private email server or Elon Musk giving full access to all government information to a nineteen-year old named Big Balls with ties to a child pornography collective known for its extortion techniques, both sides have played loose with security.

Trump Regales Jackson Mahomes With Tales Of His Old Groping Days theonion.com/trump-r...

To all Americans who are outraged by the lawless actions of the Trump/Musk oligarchical regime, stay tuned for our focus-grouped campaign ads coming to a cable news station near you in fall of 2026. by Chuck Schumer and Dick Durbin

My network fired Jim Acosta to curry favor with Trump. The best thing I can do right now for the country is keep drawing my multi-million dollar anchor salary while going easy on Trump. by Jake Tapper

Sorry, America. We can feed the elderly with Meals on Wheels or we can let billionaires cheat on their taxes. We can't do both.

Respectfully (and I genuinely mean this), I’ve never heard a single regular person ask for “bipartisanship.” That’s inside nonsense. They want things to work. If the other party refuses to work for people, be the ones who will. Fight for people. Make it plain who isn’t, and who THEY’RE for.

By arrogantly focusing on their own base, Democrats are missing out on independent voters like my cab driver in Baton Rouge, a Trump-Trump-Trump voter who refuses to register with a party because that will give the government info that they might use to seize his guns and grenades.

The world's richest man managed to take $190 million away from a *child cancer research center* with his posts yesterday. Funding now stripped in the new bill.