Emcee Hammerpants

Noooooope. Nothing for the bad guys. Nothing.

This document becomes more enjoyable by the day

I just don't think it's possible for me to hate the New York Times more than I do

quant, please don't attribute that TikTok bastardization of a neologism to the good posters of BlueSky. If there's any BlueSky specific way to say kys, it involves the study of statistical mechanics.

How is it that half the country can’t figure this shit out? The two chicks at the same time breast exam watch out for your cornhole guy isn’t struggling with it. What the hell, people? (I fuckin’ love this dude)

I’m glad I’m not the only one noticing. Swear to God schools used to be consistent and open and available all the time. I feel like I’m going crazy these days.

Shout out to elevator shenanigans. Gotta be one of my all time favorite shenanigans.

The East Wing should never be rebuilt. A small plaque should be left in the middle of a barren field that’s allowed to grow only weeds. It should be a permanent monument to the stupidest decision the people of this country have ever made.

This is my entire internet experience. Started working on this shit in ‘96. I was here for everything but apparently saw nothing. I guess I just walked right by the brain poison factory as they were building it and thought nothing of it.

Man, I, for one, am utterly shocked that an alcoholic would want to plow ahead in a desperate attempt to stay one step in front of yesterday’s consequences. Totally unheard of for the archetype.

One can only be a true gourmand if you pick up & eat dog shit off the ground. You just can’t experience the full spectrum that taste has to offer, without a mouthful of turd

"Unitary Executive for everything except responsibilities"

You have to read this. Firsthand affidavit from one of the women who was there and recording the video. She talks about how Alex Pretti was directing traffic when she arrived. She watched him be killed in front of her. She's afraid to go home, worried she'll be arrested.

Is there a good alternative to Ring? I gots to replace mine for reasons

Featured story, from @josephinelee.bsky.social: 92% of private schools already enrolled in the state's voucher programs serving kids beyond kindergarten are religious. An investigation by the Texas Observer found many of these exclude non-Christian and LGBTQ+ kids.

I’m becoming socially conservative in that I’m becoming a real tightass about civic virtue & honor. Fuck your boyfriend & his husband wearing dogsuits in private if you want, I don’t care at all, but I’m becoming pretty humorless about people feeling they have no obligation to any civic project

no greenlander ever called me a libtard

I just read the story about the kidnapped duck. This place definitely has the juice.

Bro is about to become the first GoFundMe billionaire.

Homeboy is gonna come out of the Trump era missing some teeth (hopefully not) but with a HUGE Honda sponsorship (definitely).

The three big problems from woke 1.0 I see are: 1. the emphasis on language 2. the aversion to power 3. hyper-certitude

mainline clergy acquitting themselves very well lately

The Republican Party is no longer American in any meaningful sense of the term, to borrow the language of the Claremont Institute.

DEMS: "Affordable child care" GOP: "Murder people" IDIOTS: "Both parties are the same."

To the people on this platform who use every illegal, immoral and unpatriotic action by this administration to rail at Dems can I just say how tiresome you are? If you haven't noticed the GOP holds every lever of power at the federal level. They've even usurped law enforcement. There's not a

ICE OUT NOW

Renee Nicole Good was 37. She was murdered by an ICE agent in the street in broad daylight. What really happened to her will not be forgotten, minimized, or ignored.

abolish ice is the moderate position to be honest. whichever candidate promises to nuremberg the ice agents has my vote at this point

I WANT LEADERS AS ANGRY AS WE ARE

Does anybody know her name?

They piss down my back and tell me it’s raining. It’s warm and that’s nice.

I love, love love love, love love LOVE that in a time where the race is for who can build out the most renewable capacity and the best batteries, we’re starting a war over shitty oil. Love love love.

what the fuck

Swear to God the next tech dipshit that appropriates Tolkien inappropriately should get the rope and I am not even CLOSE to kidding. Y’all can put me on a watchlist I don’t give a FUCK.

I’ve built a Pacman variant on one line, that feels surprisingly deep. Share suggestions or feedback—I’m all ears. Drop your thoughts or high score below! 🕹️ https://beep8.org #IndieLove #GameDev #PixelArt #IndieDev #SoloDev

The one and only thing Trump is right about is his contempt for the media. He’s right for the wrong reasons, but he’s still right. I’d feel nothing if many “journalists” were lined up and shot other than a vague sense they had it coming.

It would unironically be a good idea to rebrand “The Humanities” as “Metacognition Studies” or something similar