Your Pal, Ryan

the great thing about applying for a lot of jobs is that you get to interact with a lot of workday instances, all of which are terrible. for example, this one parsed my resume and thinks my god damn name is Ryan Computing

HOT TRAVEL TIP: if you don't speak the local language you can actually just point to items on the menu and say "I'm Interested In This" in a perfect Alucard voice (complete with PS1 compression) and eventually they might kick you out

after your order every item on the Burger King menu you gain access to the Reverse Burger King where eveything is upside down and the enemies are harder

bluesky a band Joy Transition.

my wife showed me an instagram of a big lady falling off a ski lift and asked me if it’s real. the 4 extra pairs of skis for some reason on that lady’s otherwise empty lift bench were a dead giveaway, but also the account was called ‘funnyaivids’. anyway she’s not living this one down anytime soon

Osaka would not say that. None of the characters from Azumanga Daioh would say that.

went to a wedding yesterday and we kept laughing at this meme

Superhuman Safety Squad #6

🚨 Password2Shell 🚨 An attacker just has to type in the username and password to gain full control. Full writeup here: man7.org/linux/man-pa...

it's hard to believe that such a beautiful mind belongs to the same woman who bought tumblr for a billion dollars and sold it for three million

This ongoing story by Haus is fascinating in how people are responding to it in a similar way to how people reacted to I Saw the TV Glow. It's either "I don't get this" or "this is borderline traumatic and you are drawing my life" and there is very little crossover. It's excellent. It's horrible.

what you did to Hila was fucked up

i've put a lot of thought into this and i finally figured out that the correct answer to the trolley problem is to kill myself

⚠️WARNING-HEALTH AND SAFETY BEFORE PLAYING, READ YOUR OPERATIONS MANUAL FOR IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT YOUR HEALTH AND SAFETY. Also online at www.nintendo.com/healthsafety/ Press Ⓐ to continue.

To: All - Intercompany From: Maintenance Subject: Metamorphosis Body: To whom it may concern, The entire maintenance department is rockabilly now. Please adjust your files as needed Sincerely, Thick Dick Rick and the Husky Boys

if you ever happen to see someone post a joke you don't understand or discuss a subject you aren't familiar with, you are well within your right to complain, and perhaps even scold them if necessary. you are their customer and you have rights

Why does this feel like a roast.

Long long ago there was a HENTAI boy whoes name was MOMODERA in SENDAI.One day he tried to apply for programmer of BOTHTEC in Tokyo.And he got a post of programmer.He worked hard everyday.One day,he eat hummberger of MC.And he dead.

Previously I have posted about a Nintendo of Europe downloadable premium animated wallpaper that featured a bizarre Toad eating the wallpaper. The files have finally been datamined, allowing the Wallpaper-Eating Toad to be observed in never-before-seen maximum quality.

Getting a billion dollars to do this shit

Please. Keep it to yourself. If you were thinking it, and I know you were, I don't want to hear it. Trust me, I already know. I have already had three people tell me that I would "be so good at improv", in three days. Including my therapist.

ok non-tech ppl might be hearing some scary things about "critical vulnerabilities" involving certificates. the main thing you need to know, without getting down in the weeds about it, is that the fourth seal is broken. lo, a rider approacheth upon a pale steed, and his name is Death