Aidan Flanagan

you don’t get ratios like this on twitter anymore

Living in a 15 minute city is great; I walk a mile in any direction and find myself back at my apartment, with only minor changes. Sure, the noises from the dog park get deeper. After the tenth iteration or so I can't read the signs anymore. But the stranger in my apartment welcomes me every time.

Guy who was waiting for the next season of Twin Peaks to answer everything and neatly wrap up the story: oh no

David Lynch gave us the language we needed to better articulate the indescribable strangeness of our shared reality. “Lynchian” is so overused because it’s a viscerally understandable word without any known synonyms. I can’t imagine a more beautiful artistic legacy than that.

David Lynch was a pioneer in so many ways but an under discussed one is having cool hair well into old age.

classic

I don't know how many of y'all are watching the migration of American TikTokers to RedNote, but it's the most fascinating thing I've EVER SEEN HAPPEN ONLINE. 🧵

My resolution this year (and every year) is to be a more available, supportive friend as well as an increasingly looming, formidable enemy.

you know who should be inducted into the rock and roll hall of fame? Sisyphus

this is funny as-is but imo way funnier when you see his lawyer

[a horse walks into a bar] bartender: what can i get you horse: what no that’s not how this format goes you’re supposed to say why the long f… you know what nvm just show me where i can get some water bartender: i could but then i can’t make you drink horse: what

[playing poker] FRIEND: I’m all in ME: [yearning for this type of commitment since we first met] me too, man, I’m all in too FRIEND: um, a pair of kings ME: you bet we are

castle doctrine includes the airspace above my house. launch the SAMs

(Ebenezer Scrooge on his way to debut his new “fun” persona to the family of the employee he’s impoverished:) Maybe I’ll razz Bob a little bit when I get there. I think we have that kind of relationship

can a chud wax lyrical over the grace of the shapely groypette for the one time

NYPD have obtained footage of the CEO Shooter going behind a sofa and descending stairs. "He is gone" said a spokesman. "so are the stairs"

Amazing that my feed, though divided, is slightly pro-assassin.

Art Teacher: your drawings are due tomorrow me: [hours later] maybe add in some grapes police sketch artist: ..a bowl of fruit attacked you?

Good news for the CEO of UnitedHealthcare: there are no concerns about preexisting conditions in hell

Blocked all the bot accounts following me and proud to report a 95% drop off in followers. Bluesky success looms ever closer

Napoleon, December 3, 1812

just looked into “martial law”. not good, folks

I don't trust AI for anything. Not since what AI-Qaeda did to those towers.

No joke, this is how I’ve lost AirPods before. It’s the worst design ever

10pm at your parents’ house as an adult feels like 3am at your own apartment.

everyone has to stop doom spiraling, shit is going to be bad enough without preemptively getting so terrified you freeze up

well clearly the lord has worked for him, I’m gonna listen to the man

@nerdjpg.com retracted their ratio on me unprompted and I do believe this is the first step to peace on this cruel world