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That is sick as fuck

look at this burnt leather sack of shit stew. fucking shambling personification of halitosis with a permanent sunburn

"And here's a terrible punt" it really was joe buck thanks

everyone’s always like amy. how do you post so good? I’ll let you in on a little secret:

Election Officials Warn That Ballots Tied To Stray Cat Unlikely To Arrive In Time https://theonion.com/election-officials-warn-that-ballots-tied-to-stray-cat-unlikely-to-arrive-in-time/

*BOLSONARO: FEDERAL POLICE REQUESTED I GIVE THEM MY PASSPORT

Years Of Learning To Love Self Undone By Single Glimpse Of Body In Self-Checkout Camera https://theonion.com/years-of-learning-to-love-self-undone-by-single-glimpse-of-body-in-self-checkout-camera/

Not only an incredible talent, but a rare talent who also thought it was funny to just voice random memes every once in a while

Figure of a Child Seated atop a Pig, 2nd–1st B.C, 📸 by @tomnweston

BREAKING: Flávio Bolsonaro admitted to hospital for “tube time”

Oh so a country *can* choose not to make the same mistake twice

THE BARNYARD PLAY that is awesome

Despite orders for polls to remain open for an extra two hours, results are already coming in, including from states with the strongest evidence of voter suppression, like Bahia. This will be a long night. What is happening is an unprecedented crime against democracy in Brazil.

• Food: $200 • Data: $150 • Rent: $800 • Pumpkins: $3,600 • Utility: $150 someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying

Out on the town having the time of my life with the other Ohio Republican political candidates who thought the ad buy was a good idea. They’re all just out of frame, laughing too.

Note to self: Start adding some discontinued Cheesecake Factory items to the docket ...

Now this is the kind of football that gets my motor runnin’

if you ever happen to see someone post a joke you don't understand or discuss a subject you aren't familiar with, you are well within your right to complain, and perhaps even scold them if necessary. you are their customer and you have rights

Booty had me like

the Internet rn

announcer: the one thing he can't do here is take a sack the qb:

guys the only way I can run this business is if I cook rats and the children I snatch from the playground behind my house why do you want me to fail? Why do you want to crush my dreamsssssss like thissssss 🥺

I don't want to be forced to disclose what I put in my burgers bc making them with rat meat is so much better for my bottom line as a small food business

[racks shotgun] We don’t do AI round here, mister

as always: video was a mistake, text is the only safe way to interact with Online

This is what Yoda had Luke doing on Dagobah

Not the top Steam review of Dressmaker making me cry this morning!

punkin dunkin

music.youtube.com/watch?v=Ry9l...

Legitimately a dream to write something that inspires a reader to "go Martin Luther Mode."

I don't know what it is about it, but when women have their hair tied back, and they have a few strands not tied and it drapes around their face on both sides, I just think it is so god damn alluring, like a siren song. It's crazy

I sing to my animals regularly. It's a requirement. They love it

a message from the future

This is probably the most understated funny thing I’ve heard an athlete say on purpose in my life.