Donald Trump’s Red Hot Pussy

Reposted with alt text. Also, from a cursory look, this appears to basically be true, which is pretty funny. Philosophers... debate.

Wow as a response to the nazi salutes Dem leadership just announced they're gonna start making a heart shape with their hands and kinda push it toward the audience

Taking over my father's manscaping business

How soon until the Washington Post just deems random capitalization the modern style?

This is the shape of the crisis: to prevent cataclysmic climate breakdown, we have to RADICALLY cut carbon pollution at a completely unprecedented rate. All prior climate policy has failed. Any university without a massive, cross-disciplinary program to inform this task is part of the problem.

From the archive. 🛰️🚀🚙 #ElonMusk

biden isn’t special, we’re all saying farewell to the nation

What makes this holiday season so special to me is that my trash days are unaffected

I propose a 6 ft wide time zone that's a hundred years into the future

Squid Game Season 2 felt like 90% filler

quentin tarantino became a director because he loves footage

Has global warming accelerated in recent decades? If we look at the rate of warming between 1970 and 2008 and extend it through present, we see that almost all years since 2015 are above the previous trend.

FDA Bans Captain Morgan Rum After Having Way Too Much Of That Shit In College theonion.com/fda-bans-cap...

Throwback to the March for Science—an inspiring day standing up for facts, progress, and the importance of evidence-based policy. #MarchForScience #ScienceMatters

I'm going to post this video every day so we never forget

Denver gave people experiencing homelessness $1k/month. A year later, nearly half had housing. They also had fewer ER visits, nights spent in a hospital, and jail stays. The report estimates that this reduction in public service use SAVED the city $589k. www.businessinsider.com/denver-basic...

is it dumb, pointless, petty and juvenile? yes. but if I'm forced to say it out loud will I be pronouncing that DOGE nonsense as douche? yes.

Headed to the trampoline park to hand out some loose cigarettes.

Hi, I’m God. Jesus said he wants you all to have free healthcare. Love, God

Would love to be able to censor sports content from my feeds the same way elon censors pro democracy posts.

Me with a yeast infection

What shows up on the “popular with friends” feed if you don’t have any friends?

Breaking: HBO Max in heated negotiations with owner of mex.com

My 9 month old eats strawberries with the same enthusiasm as God consuming sinners.

Just changed my Wi-Fi password to christpleaseentermyheart

Ad buyers are very confident that I am diabetic based on my social media feeds. Feeling the need to get checked. What do they know that I don’t

If your restaurant includes the word “melty” in its advertising, a toddler is writing your copy.

To brewers experimenting with sage in your cider: you don’t need to subject innocent consumers at dinner parties to this.

Just rolled a critical fail masturbating.