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NO!

That’s a really good reminder!

Damnit big gubmint stop trying to tell me what to do

I'm suddenly feeling seen!!!!

You failed to mention uphill both ways!

Did admin get their start on the U.S. Consumer Newspaper Delivery Commission? 😄

*All that to say during the holidays some people would leave you extra cash and small gifts sometimes with personalized notes saying thanks. It might not have made up for the falls, and walks through cobwebs, and sweatshirts covered in ink, but it did make you feel appreciated in the neighborhood.

But, you got paid far less than minimum wage every 2 weeks, so it had that going for it

Was it just ours, or did everyone's Sunday paper come in two parts and you had to put them together first, too?

Bitter?

Your Sunday paper must’ve been thinner than ours?

I helped my father with his route on Sundays. I had to hang out the window and throw the paper with both hands and try to time my release with his swerve to the next house across the street.

Someone clearly still has trauma.

Despite you being "U.S. CPSC" I still thought you were talking about 28℃ and was like "HA that a good Fall/Spring day try 38℃!" then I realized you meant Fahrenheit and it made a lot more sense.

And heaven help you if the paper landed anywhere other than that welcome mat...

I think it's been a teen and up job here for a while bcz distance between houses, but also, man I miss newspapers (free wrapping paper and packing materials lol).

I remember those days. Paper media tries every day to turn us all digital. Customers didn’t abandon newspapers, newspapers abandoned us. When you stopped printing local news (obits etc), my bros dumped you. Larger companies to follow. You committed suicide. Same with our previously great MSM.

My local waste disposal services want me to deliver any hazmats for disposal in a cardboard box lined with old newspaper. Any idea where I can get old newspaper?

Modern version: faster than a Tesla.

LMAO. I was going to say, the darkest days in history, the olden days with the job I had at 13 were used as historical context to describe to a modern public WHAT A NEWSPAPER WAS. Then again, we're just people born in the 1900s to many of these kids.

this is some quality government content right up in here

Our wagon was green and also used for the garden. *nods*

Nederlands hat een Biblebelt?

I just watered my artificial, pre-lit tree. Am I doing it right?

Maybe just don't get one. I gathered kids I knew in our trailer park, took them to a big slate stone clearing with a Christmas tree, had them stand way back and lit it. Within a minute they were moving back because you can feel the great from thirty feet on a cold winter day.

GO FURTHER. You are onto something here. Give us the whitepaper!

Is Trump going to eliminate you?

Take notes from Clark Griswold and his family on what not to do with live trees.

Water your plastic squirrels too

How do I get the job being the person who lights things on fire for the Consumer Product Safety Commission?

God, please don't let the Muskrat defund this amazing department.

I know you are an American organization but I feel all of Bluesky, regardless of nationality ,could benefit from remembering that trees are made of wood and therefore are terrifyingly flammable when they aren't hydrated.

Will anything bad happen if I water my fake Christmas tree?

Me and my fake tree watching the video 👁️👄👁️

No common sense left…SMH

Admit it; you guys took this job just for an excuse to set things on fire and blow them up real good, right? I mean, I’m not complaining…

This account is 🔥

This is just a piece of a tree. Burning the whole tree at once would possibly burn down my neighborhood

Whatever is happening here is so good

Okay but what about all my decoy Christmas trees?

I really hope y'all don't get axed your content is great

Yikes!

That squirrel did nothing! Shame on him!

Instructions unclear, set fire to my fake Christmas tree.