Ruth Burger

Everybody needs somebody to be weird with.

AAAAAAAAHHHHH

I'm just delusional enough to remain stubbornly optimistic.

My ten gallon hat only holds nine gallons of salsa

I don't like egg nog but if you have any other types of nog please let me know

Escape room but it's just me and a block of cheese.

Sometimes I worry that laying down in my free time isn’t a hobby

Hate when someone figures out my password and I have to rename my cat

Back in the day you could look at the internet for up to an hour without getting mad.

It's National Lie Down For A Bit Day

The light of the full moon, mixed with a cold wind on an October night

Looking up at the bright Hunter's Moon, we take turns trying to shoot it out of the sky, as tradition warrants.

Buying up all the circus peanuts to make an edible foam pit

Let's listen to music and pretend nothing else exists

But if I were a groupie, my name would be velvet shadow

Another night, another conversation with the moon

The moon deserves to be admired

Motherfuckers be motherfucking. ~ 2026

Shitposts are a love language

Deep down, everyone knows about the spiders.

The disinfectant stings like mean little kisses. Angry little healing wishes. Violent little prayers.

SOMEONE'S GOING TO GET HURT IN THIS SITUATION AND ITS NOT GOING TO BE ME *its totally going to be me

I had a Panick Attack and I’m alive. I'M STILL ALIVE!

If cheese was a man I'd marry it

Just got blown out of a harmonica...but anyway.

How much cheese would you like with that meltdown? Say when.

I wonder where your mind goes, and if I ever cross it

screaming into a microphone may fix me

ran out of dry shampoo so I sprinkled some parmesan cheese in my hair

I've read and wildly disagreed to these terms and conditions