Mike Wood

Something I wish more people would realize.

Because it was never a lampoon

Guillermo Del Toro dropping another one liner that’s exactly how I feel about AI slop, the “punishment” is built in

Seems easily solved by a large angry mob.

Those Boston Dynamics employees need to quit, start a company and make robot squirrels to distract the robot dogs. Actions speak louder than words.

The pattern is obvious to even the most neurotypical brain: Elon Musk is a lying liar fraud.

It's just a dude in a robot suit. The flying car is a hollow shell. Elon Musk is a billionaire.

Always a sign of a healthy society.

Now the rest of Canada gets to have a 10-question referendum on how we want to interact with Alberta, right?

an alien cover band called ripley and the face huggers

ngl it is very strange that the screaming hot center of the global economy can't figure out how to keep its transit solvent

Don't fall for it! This is how lettuce creeps back in.

Go fuck yourselves. Put all the US booze back on the shelves and watch us not buy it. Maybe visit D.C. with your big ideas about how to end trade wars.

everyone wants to live in a good neighborhood without being a good neighbor

At the top of the stairs. With a full diaper.

My man looks like Paul Giamatti after an ayahuasca ceremony

Billionaires should be hunted for sport. Good fish and game policy requires there be a bag limit though. It would be irresponsible to just hoard their pelts just for yourself.

hey, you okay? I heard they made a beloved indie horror game about your fucked up gross apartment

*mouth full of mac and cheese* im powerful

All politics is municipal politics

Man who won’t give his employees piss breaks claims many piss breaks on the horizon

Telescopes cause over-discovery of celestial objects

"I don’t know what every person in that group saw or knew. But I am raising one of the others. The boy who might someday be in the room. Or holding the phone. The boy who didn’t do it. The boy who could therefore spend the rest of his life explaining that he didn’t do anything." buff.ly/z7yWbR2

Poem in the Shape of the Poet Beating Henry Kissinger to Death with Their Bare Hands by Felix

m.youtube.com/watch?v=WYpZ...

He-Man in one hand, Darth Vader in the other. "Now this corporate media merger is complete!" {smooching noises}

I like you so much I won’t even correct you when you’re doing my dog’s voice wrong.

[car dealership waiting room] Me: [chanting] knobs, knobs- Other car buyers: knobs, KNOBS Car salesman: [pounding desk] KNOBS, KNOBS, KNOBS!

Holy shit.

Until our intern Gavin completes the blood tests, please assume all enclosures contain The Thing. Thank you for your patience.

Have you noticed, lately, or noticed people around you commenting, that there just seems to be no money anymore. There's no money for companies to make the tv shows you like, the video games you like, the local diner you like shut down, no one you know can find a job. Think about that in context of

seeing conservative men debate how to dress online is very funny. can't dress up or wear interesting casualwear bc you've made any visible interest in dress to be a sign of homosexuality. but you feel the need to dress better bc you've linked dress to respectability. a prison of your own making.

NYT really asking the important questions. What would Benjamin Disraeli think about the Eras Tour? What would Virgina Woolf say about cryptocurrency? Does Philip the Navigator have a favorite chocolate chip cookie recipe?

Bread & Circuses

America’s sorting-hat seems to be who read Steinbeck at 13, who read Ayn Rand, who read Tolkien, and who read not-much-at-all

X-Men of a Certain Age

I don’t need fuck you money but it would be nice to stop having fuck me money

My daughter, 24, put ‘educated before AI’ on her CV. The kids already know this.

@darkhorsedirect.bsky.social I would love to wear a garment with either a DarkHorse logo, or the celebratory 40yr one. I cannot find such a thing. Do they exist?

AOC should run for President and convert this into the Office of Butlerian Jihad

this looks like ron swanson lost a devastating bet

Do you think this is a case of nominative determinism

Listen to that CRUNCH. Absolutely delicious. #WorldBollardAssociation

What if he fell asleep in his chair and then didn't wake up? How long before someone checks on him with a little whappitybap to the back of his head?

[at my autopsy; a forensic pathologist speaks into a recording device in a puzzled tone] “I’ve never seen so many apple stickers inside of someone”

I believe fraternity hazing and military hazing and sports team hazing where men abuse each other is acclimating them into a broader culture of abuse where they will then believe it is their right to abuse other more vulnerable people. It’s so insidious. And that’s also why I think men defend it